Those Were the Days
by In To The West Away
Summary: "We'd sing and dance, forever and a day." The Hogwarts life of Lily and James in eight parts (along with mischievous Marauders, the honest Mary MacDonald and a thoroughly determined Emmeline Vance) revolving around petty gossips, fist-fights, love-struck teenagers, embryonic terrorists, put-upon professors, steadfast friends, and of course, the dreaded question: "Do you fancy..."
1. The Journey Begins

_**The Journey Begins: January 1972**_

James Potter had always liked train journeys, and the Hogwarts Express was, of course, the greatest of them all. Watching the steady shift in the scenery that flashed by the window- from wide Cambridgeshire fields to glowering, snow-capped mountains- was fascinating, even he could admit that. More importantly, however, there was a food trolley stocked with all manner of tooth-rotting goodies. There were no teachers or parents to censor him either, which meant nothing other than pure, unrestrained freedom to make as much mischief as he chose. Even the prefects weren't particularly bothered about what people got up to on the train so long as it didn't cause any lasting damage. From the moment they pulled out of King's Cross Station, therefore, James had settled down to enjoy eight hours' of fiendish plotting in the company of a pile of brightly-coloured sweets and his equally devious partners-in-crime. It was bliss, perfect bliss.

Or at least, it was for the most part. A notable exception being the moment when Emmeline Vance walked in.

"Hey Potter, Potter. Do you fancy Lily Evans?"

There was a rasping noise as James choked on a Bertie Botts' Every Flavour Bean in disgust- and for once not because of the taste. The action set off a rather theatrical fit of coughing and he doubled over as a thoroughly alarmed Remus Lupin thumped him on the back.

"What- the- hell- Vance?!" He wheezed dramatically.

The dark-haired girl at the compartment door didn't seem particularly moved by his little performance. Instead, she simply stared at him expectantly. James gave one or two last, pitiful, hacking coughs for effect and straightened up, goggling at her. "Where in the name of Merlin's skimpiest bikini did you get that idea?"

"Well why not? What's wrong with Evans? She seems nice enough."

"Well she's got a funny way of showing it. You know what she called Sirius? A poodle!" James was suddenly very defensive of his friend, despite having teased Sirius over that particular appellation for the past month. "He looks nothing like a poodle- a mangy hound yes, but not a poodle! And she's friends with that Snape kid so there must be _something_ wrong with her," He added, wrinkling his nose. "Seriously Vance. Me, fancy Lily Evans? I'd rather drink undiluted bubotuber pus."

Emmeline gazed at him thoughtfully, spinning a curl around her finger as she did so. "Mm. Well, if you say so."

"I do say so!" He couldn't help but be outraged. The nerve of her! "How did you even come up with this whole thing?"

The girl shrugged. "Oh well it was just that you tease her so much," She answered blithely, as if it were obvious. "My mum says boys often tease girls to hide the fact that they're secretly in love with them."

"Well your mum needs her head seen to," James said rudely. "Do I need to say it again? I am not, nor will I ever be, in love with Evans. I mean- it's just- that's bloody_ revolting_."

Vance still looked disbelieving and James could feel his face turning purple, his fingers itching for his wand. Luckily, Remus took control of the situation before he could do anything stupid.

"Look, Vance you've got your answer. You can tell your friend Skeeter to mind her own business and if I were you, I'd clear out before James implodes. It means he'll blow up, but inwards not outwards," He added, when she looked confused. "Now if you don't mind, we'd like you to leave us alone."

Vance looked for a moment as if she might argue, but a glance at James' puce countenance seemed to make her rethink. Instead, she settled for assuming a lofty expression and sniffed haughtily, "Fine, but when he's crying over her picture in the middle of the night, don't say I didn't warn you."

And with that, she span round on her heel and marched away down the corridor.

James slumped back in his seat. "Honestly, can you believe her?" He muttered, scowling after her as he shovelled Bertie Botts' Every Flavour Beans into his mouth angrily. "I mean, what was _that_?"

"Don't mind Vance, I heard Professor McGonagall say she's just got a very over-active imagination. She'll grow out of it." Remus said reasonably, picking up his copy of 'The Adventures of Martin Miggs' and once again busying himself with the latest tales of the Mad Muggle's vacuum cleaner problems.

After a moment, however, he remarked with an air of nonchalance. "You're really sure you _don't_ fancy Evans though, aren't you?"

"Not you too!" His friend's howl of betrayal echoed around the carriage, causing several of the occupants of neighbouring compartments to jump. Remus winced and shrunk down behind his magazine. "Alright, alright, I was just asking. I wouldn't blame you if you did. She's not that bad, really."

"She's a _girl_," James whined in disgust, as though her gender explained everything. "And she's friends with _Snivellus_."

"Ok, I get it. You don't like Evans. Point taken. I just thought-" But whatever Remus thought was never revealed, for at that moment the compartment door was thrown open and Sirius Black stalked in, wearing a murderous expression.

James seized upon the distraction gladly. "Alright, mate? Have a good Christmas?"

"Oh yeah, it was fan-bloody-tastic," The other boy threw his trunk into the overhead rack as though it had personally offended him. "The conversation over Christmas dinner was particularly sparkling, I thought. Apparently, the fact that I forgot which fork to use is proof that Gryffindor house is full of, and I quote, "ill-bred peasants and filthy degenerates'."

"Ah well, that's us, filthy degenerates to the core," James joked, looking sympathetic. "Cheer up though, we'll be back at Hogwarts soon. Pete's probably been almost_ civilised_, without us there to show him how to behave."

"Yeah, how many times d'you reckon Peeves has locked him in the girls' toilets so far? Must be at least a dozen…" Remus piped up, encouraged by Sirius' slight smile and within a few minutes the three boys were laughing and talking happily again, Black family dinners having been entirely forgotten.

So, for that matter, had all thoughts of Lily Evans. But Emmeline Vance didn't give up so easily. For her, this was only the beginning.

* * *

_**Yes, I know it's been done before, but I couldn't resist having a crack at a Jily fic. I suppose I'm also hoping to show something of how they interacted with their friends at Hogwarts too though, so maybe that's something I can do differently! **_

_**Other chapters are likely to be quite a bit longer. I have shamelessly pilfered the title and summary quote for this piece from Mary Hopkin's 1968 song "Those Were the Days" but that song just suits the Marauders Era so well that I couldn't really help myself.**_

_**Anyway, hope you enjoy. Please review, that really helps :)**_


	2. Rainy Days and Mondays

_**Rainy Days and Mondays: December 1972**_

On reflection, Lily Evans thought that the rumours must have started during her very first year, though it hadn't been until second year that she had come across them herself. In her defence, she had been a little bit too distracted by the fact that she was attending a school of magic to have much time for gossip, and as she had stuck close to Severus for most of her early years at Hogwarts, she seemed to have missed out on a lot of the girl talk in the dormitories. And at the age of eleven, well, who really cared anyway?

As it turned out, a surprising number of people _did_\- or perhaps Emmeline Vance and Rita Skeeter were simply everywhere at once. Lily didn't grudge people the need for a little gossip. Or at least, she didn't in later years, once she had come to realise how important it was for Hogwarts students to escape the ever-growing growing darkness that they all knew lurked just outside the walls.

But at twelve years old, that wasn't so easy to accept or even to understand. When Primrose Brown suddenly turned cold and haughty one morning, after the only thing Lily had done was pass James Potter a quill in Charms, it simply left her hurt and confused. And even a few months later, when Primrose seemed to have grown up a bit and apologised heartily for her behaviour, Lily still couldn't see what all the fuss was about. Especially since whenever she tried to tell people that she didn't even like Potter all that much, and that she was sure the feeling was mutual, she only seemed to be met with sniggers and knowing smiles. Feelings of anger and frustration and isolation, in a world that had otherwise been perfect, made her even more determined not to give Potter the time of day where anyone could see her. And he, for his part, didn't do much to help matters, going out of his way to antagonise her whenever someone seemed to be watching, and avoiding her with just the merest hint of apologetic and ashamed discomfort whenever they weren't. In time, she began to forget that it hadn't even been his fault to begin with.

The worst point came just before Christmas that year. Lily was sitting quietly in front of the fire in the Common Room, trying desperately to finish a mountain of Transfiguration homework that had been due the day before, and doing her best to ignore the large group of first and second years laughing and talking noisily on the carpet in front of her, practically swollen with Christmas spirit as they swapped chocolate frog cards and knocked each other over in their attempts to win at Exploding Snap. This was already a difficult enough task with the knowledge that she'd have to break concentration soon to go to Astronomy, without having to endure the moronic chanting and cheering which accompanied Sirius Black's careful defacing of the prefect rota on the noticeboard. _Wow, Black if you swap round some of the letters in the names S. Podmore and F. Longbottom you get Loner Poobottom. How hilarious. I'm laughing my socks off._

Almost as soon as this thought crossed her mind, she felt annoyed with herself. She should really be more understanding. _But it's Black, he's a bully and anyway, it's not like he'd care what I think…_ Still. She shouldn't take out her anger on people who didn't have anything to do with it. Instead, she glared at her Transfiguration books, trying to make sense of the muddling words and complicated charts.

_Dear Lily, I know you're only young but your father and I think you should know…_

_Darling Lily, look after Petunia for me. She cares for you too, really…_

_Don't worry Lily, I'm only going further up and further in, just like in those books you were so fond of…_

_Always be yourself, Lily. Be kind and helpful and don't be afraid to stand up for what you believe in. Your instincts are usually right after all…_

_My sweet, clever little girl, be strong. Mummy loves you. With a bit of luck we'll see each other over Christmas- perhaps you and Tuney could help me make the mince pies this year? I'm only sorry I've missed so much of your world…_

It was too much. Her eyes swam and she slammed the book shut. She wanted to talk to Severus, but midnight wasn't for another hour and if she were caught wandering the corridors before Astronomy she'd get detention, or worse, she'd be docked house points. Still, it might be worth the risk…

Her thoughts were suddenly interrupted as a great cry erupted from the group in front of her. James Potter was attempting to wrestle Black down off the stool he had been using to reach the noticeboard and the two swayed dangerously in front of the fire as Black attacked his friend's face with a bottle of ink. Then Potter's foot slipped and he was falling, throwing out a hand to steady himself as he plummeted backwards…

…And, to her horror, tumbled straight into her lap. Her books and parchment went flying as she let out an unearthly screech and shoved him away from her. Potter, looking a little dazed, slipped onto the floor and rubbed the back of his head gingerly where it had caught on her Transfiguration textbook. "What-"

A group of nearby sixth years, who really should have had better things to do than torment a pair of twelve year olds, were sniggering.

"Oh they're so _sweet_." Lily heard one of the girls cooing as Black, now king of the stool, surveyed his defeated opponent imperiously. "I'd no idea you were so loud Evans. In fact, in honour of your people's loyal service to the Crown, I hereby decree that all such traitors as this specky midget be thrown to the banshees to deal with as they please."

A great roar of laughter greeted his announcement. Potter got to his feet, a nasty-looking bump throbbing on the back of his skull, as the sixth years giggled harder and a first year by the name of Towler bellowed. "Just snog and get it over with!"

Potter spluttered, still seeming slightly giddy, as he choked out the usual protests. Lily didn't stop to listen as she clutched at the pieces of parchment on the floor, tears stinging her eyes. Seemingly getting nowhere with his denials, Potter kicked out at random, his foot connecting with her notes and scattering them further across the floor. Lily made a grab for them but she was not quick enough to prevent them being torn under the unwitting feet of her fellow students.

At the sound of the ripping parchment, something inside her snapped. "For God's sake, you spoil everything!" She yelled at the offending boy, who stood shocked and speechless in front of her. "Why can't you just stay away from me?"

"Animal magnetism!" A third year boy piped up. He, it seemed, was a little more obtuse than the rest of the students in the Common Room, who had all fallen very silent. Tears stung her eyes and before she knew what she was doing, she had picked up the heavy Transfiguration book and hurled it at his face. The third year let out a howl of pain as the spine connected with his teeth but Lily didn't stop to apologise as she stormed away from the scene, shoving her way through the portrait hole and out into the corridor.

Leaning against the wall, she took a deep breath. So much for being kind and forgiving! But with all the noise and the jeering laughter and the people pressing around her, she had forgotten all of that. _It's just a bit of fun to them_, she thought as she tried to force herself to relax. _They don't know how much it affects the people on the other end. They're just immature, don't mind them._

But still her breathing choked in her throat and, unable to hold it in any longer, she moved towards the stairs and flung herself down on the top step, letting out an angry sob.

For nearly ten minutes she sat there, hugging her knees as she rested her head against the banister miserably, her cheeks streaked with tears and her nose red. What was she supposed to do now? She didn't particularly care if a teacher caught her out after curfew anymore, but she couldn't go to find Severus looking like this. He would know something had happened and then he would probably make some snide remark about Potter and Black which, even if she happened to agree with it, was not something she felt up to listening to. After all, she knew that, although it helped to have someone to blame, it hadn't really been Potter's fault and she didn't particularly want to have to listen to rants about him. She didn't want to think about him at all. What she wanted was for someone to give her a hug and tell her everything would be alright- that it was all just silly nonsense which would blow over soon.

What she wanted, was her mum.

The thought of her practical, unshakeably positive mother only brought on a fresh wave of tears. Ever since the letter had arrived that morning, she had been walking around in a daze but now every emotion was flooding out of her- anger, disbelief, horror, grief. She was sure that Petunia had been pulled out of school, but as it was only a week to go until Christmas, her parents probably thought their younger daughter would be happier up here, away from the gloom of the house. They both wanted her to be happy at Hogwarts, but now Lily wasn't so sure. For all its magic, school didn't seem quite so wonderful anymore.

Something creaked behind her and she glanced around, half-hoping that the Fat Lady might have returned to her frame. She had always liked Aurora, who could be very comforting when not consuming copious amounts of painted sherry. But, to her dismay, the portrait swung forward, and she quickly turned her head away again, not wanting to be seen crying by any of her fellow Gryffindors.

"Er- do you want these back?" James Potter's voice asked.

Lily wanted to sink through the floor. However, it soon became apparent that the vanishing step on the staircase was not about to oblige her and, hastily wiping her eyes with her sleeve, she stood up and turned to face him.

Potter was holding out a stack of dog-eared parchment, his other hand stuffed in his pocket and his shoulders hunched stiffly. "Moony helped mend it. Got rid of the ink stains and stuff."

Lily snatched at her homework, not quite trusting him with it. Then, feeling guilty again, she muttered. "Tell him thanks."

There was a pause in which both studiously avoided the other's gaze. Potter removed his glasses and polished them on his jumper nervously. Then he finally managed to force the words out of his mouth.

"I'm sorry, you know. I didn't mean to fall."

"No, it wasn't your fault." Lily admitted through gritted teeth. She really, really wanted to be nice about it, but while Potter was not really responsible for her humiliation this time, she couldn't quite bring herself to feel sorry for him. To tell, the truth, she was quite sick of the sight of him and wished he'd go away.

Potter, however, clearly had no such intention and, after another brief, awkward silence, he shrugged lamely. "Well no hard feelings, eh?" He made a half-hearted attempt at a grin.

Lily blinked. "That's it?" She couldn't keep herself from blurting out. Potter looked mildly surprised and she blushed.

"Well, I mean, what about the other times? What about last week in Potions?" She asked, sounding a lot braver than she felt.

Potter shrugged again. "Well, fine then. Sorry for whatever I did to offend you then too."

"You threw a firework into Severus' cauldron." Lily said coolly. "If that Swelling Solution hadn't been made correctly-"

"Yeah, that was pretty funny," Potter said dreamily, and then, noticing the look on her face, scoffed. "Oh come on, it was just a joke-"

"Maybe. If that had been the first time." She shook her head, turning away. "Seriously Potter, just stay away from me. And Sev. Pick on someone else for a change."

"I'll stay away from him when he stays away from me!" He burst out hotly. "He's no harmless little Puffskein, your pal. Him and his mates put Sirius in the Hospital Wing for a week last year."

"I'm sure Black got his revenge," She couldn't resist shooting back. "That was the time that he let a rabid jarvey loose in the Slytherin dormitories wasn't it? And anyway, it wasn't Sev's fault really, he was just there. Mulciber was the one who actually hexed your little friend."

"Oh great, so he just associates with pure-blood supremacists, that's a relief."

"Didn't think you knew what supremacist meant, Potter."

"Didn't think you were one, Evans."

Lily gaped at him. Surely nobody could be that stupid? Eventually she realised she would have to spell it out. "You _idiot_. I'm_ muggle-born_. In case you hadn't noticed."

That seemed to stump him; admittedly, they had rarely spoken outside of arguing with each other, but it still shouldn't have come as a surprise.

"Well," He floundered after a minute. "Maybe you should think about who you hang around with. I mean, it's not exactly safe-"

"Excuse me?" Lily's temper flared and she had to remind herself not to rise to the bait. _Walk away, Evans, walk away_.

After a few seconds of glaring at him, grinding her teeth and wondering if he was particularly attached to his knee-caps, she managed to regain control of herself.

"Maybe you should take a good look at yourself first before you start judging others, Potter. Moralising doesn't suit you." She spat, turning on her heel and stalking away before she lost control.

"Yeah well, you just wait!" Potter shouted after her, though in a voice that lacked some of his usual bravado. "You'll see what I mean!"

Lily hurried on towards the Astronomy Tower, feeling that the day could hardly get any worse. But if there was one thing she was sure of it was that, no matter the rumours, she could _never_ be induced to fancy James Potter.

* * *

It was late the next morning when Emmeline Vance slipped into the Great Hall, having slept in considerably after a night of Professor Dexter droning on about light pollution and the magnificence of Jupiter. Luckily, Rita Skeeter was not known for rising any earlier than half nine even on weekdays, and so she was not too hard to spot amongst the last of the breakfast things spread across the Ravenclaw table. Casting a hasty glance over her shoulder at her own house, Emmeline noted with slight relief that only Frank Longbottom and Gideon Prewett were still eating, and that none of her own year were hanging around.

She hadn't been very popular in the girls' dormitory the previous night. After Lily Evans had knocked out Paul Sloper's front teeth with a Transfiguration textbook and stormed out of the portrait hole, everyone had suddenly felt quite ashamed of themselves, and not particularly well-disposed to the person they considered to be the source of the whole misunderstanding. Primrose Brown and Quinta Dunbar had been polite but cold, and Mary MacDonald had been quite blunt in her disapproval. As for Lily herself, Emmeline had not had the courage to look her in the eye when she next saw her in Astronomy, pale-faced and thin-lipped. Even if the others hadn't disapproved though, she had seen enough to know that the whole affair had gone too far.

Sliding onto a bench beside Rita, she dispensed with the usual greetings and compliments on her friend's attire, and got straight to the point. "We need to stop."

"Stop what?" Rita frowned. "Honestly, Sylvie, you're not very polite today. You haven't even asked me how my date went."

Emmeline winced. Rita Skeeter was a difficult person to chastise, but as a shy first year who had really just wanted someone to talk to, she had been quite grateful when the older girl had taken her under her wing on the Hogwarts Express. So grateful that she hadn't even complained much when Rita had decided that her middle name, Sylvia, was much prettier than Emmeline and insisted on addressing her as such. So grateful that when she had mentioned how nice she thought Lily Evans and James Potter would be together, she had done everything Rita said she should to try and force some kind of accord between them, regardless of her personal misgivings.

But now it had to stop. "We should leave Evans and Potter alone. Lily was really upset last night."

"Ooh, why? Lovers' tiff?" Rita's eyes were wide with glee.

Emmeline shook her head irritably. "No, nothing like that. I just- I think Evans is under a lot of pressure at the moment and we're not helping things with these rumours."

"What? Not helping? But Sylvia, we're helping her discover her true love!"

"Yes but…maybe this isn't the right time. You know?"

"No, I don't. You're the one who wanted them to get together," Rita pointed out irritably, as she emptied a box of Cheery Owls into her bowl. "Are you saying that you don't think you're right anymore? Is it Potter? Should we get some dirt on him, see if he's the problem?"

"No!" Emmeline said hastily. "Please don't talk to Potter! And I do think they should be together- or at least I did. But…we can't exactly _force_ them to get along can we? It's not really our business after all."

"Look, if Evans is going to go around knocking out people's teeth then it _becomes _our business," Rita gave her a disappointed look as she dug a spoon into her cereal. "What, did you _really_ think I hadn't heard? I'm surprised that you didn't tell me sooner."

Emmeline shook her head miserably. "I'm sorry Rita, but I really can't do it anymore. It's not fair-"

"Not fair? What's not fair is I spent all that time helping you with your little crusade and now there's not even any kind of decent pay-off. I mean really, Sylvie, you might think of the risks_ I_ take sometimes- I won't be able to show my face around Gryffindor Tower for weeks!"

Emmeline fidgeted and sighed. Rita was right, it was her own mistake and others were paying for it. She had to do _something _to make it up to her. After a moment, she began tentatively. "I really am sorry Rita. I've been a bit silly about the whole thing. But…well, don't tell him I told you, but I think Tiberius McLaggen really fancies you. And he won't talk to us if Evans and Potter keep fighting."

That caught Rita's interest. "Tiberius McLaggen? What would I do with an awful swot like him? Still," She mused, looking thoughtful. "He _is_ very tall. And those muscles…"

She gave Emmeline an appraising look. "Alright, we'll give Evans a break for a bit. I was getting bored anyway."

Emmeline breathed a sigh of relief. It was a pity really, that her vision hadn't come true, but she wasn't willing to ruin someone's life over a silly little idea she'd had nearly a year ago. And anyway, one could always dream. Plastering a smile on her face, she buttered a slice of toast.

"So, how did your date go?"

* * *

**_Not the funniest or happiest of chapters, I'm afraid, but hopefully it's done its work. _**

**_Anyway, hope if you have any thoughts on it you let me know! And thank you very much to the Guest Reviewer who I obviously can't PM to thank :)_**

**_Chapter title taken from the title of the song 'Rainy Days and Mondays', by the Carpenters, from 1971_**


	3. Big Change in the Weather

_**Big Change in the Weather: May 1974**_

Nobody was quite sure of the reason for the sudden change in the weather on the first of May, but it was not entirely unexpected. It was, of course, quite typical that it should rain all the way through the Easter holidays and two Quidditch matches, and then brighten up as soon as exam revision kicked in. This predictability, however, did not make it any more welcome, and even a Dementor's heart might have softened at the pitiful expressions on the faces of the older students as they gazed forlornly out from behind complicated Transfiguration diagrams and dusty accounts of Goblin rebellions, sniffing longingly whenever someone opened the library window and a sudden breeze swept in tantalising scents of freshly-cut grass, sweet honeysuckle, and pungent blackcurrant.

But a professor is a very different beast from a Dementor, and, when it comes to exams, twice as terrifying. And so, with a multitude of gloomy fifth, sixth, and seventh years filling every alcove and turret of the castle, and with the teachers on high alert for any sign of mischief, the younger students found solace outdoors. Some of the more conscientious, deciding that they could hardly ignore the pressing concern of their own exams, squeezed into whatever small space they could find in the library. But when faced with such clear blue skies and balmy weather, most paid little attention to their education beyond obligatory attendance of classes and dodging the prefects' wrath whilst they scribbled down some half-baked essay and then escaped outside again. Lastly, of course, there were the few who had quickly made up their minds that a hot day was enough of a rare phenomenon to excuse them from doing any work whatsoever, whether in the classroom or without.

Rather unsurprisingly, James Potter fell into this final category. On a Wednesday morning his timetable normally consisted of enjoying an extra hour's sleep in History of Magic and tampering dangerously with the wires of the model television set in Muggle Studies before rushing off to catch the previous night's Quidditch scores on the wireless during morning break. Third period saw him courageously fighting off the attentions of a particularly amorous (or hungry, he could never tell) Venomous Tentacula in Herbology, and then fourth was spent in Potions, throwing Flobberworm Mucus at the Slytherins and interrupting Professor Slughorn's lesson to ask whether it was possible for Horklumps to grow on the human body, _"Or is that just Snape's normal face, sir?"_

But not today. For once the temperature had actually exceeded ten degrees, and that meant only one thing- bunking off. Which had been fun for approximately half an hour until Mrs Norris had caught Sirius trying to sneak food out of the kitchens and his friend had been hauled off to class by an irate Professor McGonagall. After that, Remus had decided it was simply safer to go to his Care of Magical Creatures lesson, and so James and Peter had been left to amuse themselves.

To be fair to Pete, he wasn't bad company. After all, it had been his idea to use James' invisibility cloak to sneak into the library and levitate books just out of reach of the seventh years trying to read them. And that _had_ been extremely amusing, until Galiena Burke ended up sobbing into her robes in frustration and James had felt so guilty that the joke seemed to have fallen a little flat. After that, it had been out into the grounds to lounge under the beech trees and enjoy the feeling of having absolutely nothing to do.

There was only one flaw in this otherwise excellent waste of time: after five minutes, James was as bored as a Flobberworm without any lettuce.

"I'm bored." He moaned, just to make sure that Peter knew about it.

"So what should we do?" Asked Peter, who had been perfectly aware.

"Dunno," James cast around for ideas and spotted a large pink mound perched on the edge of the Lake. "Reckon the Squid would suit ribbons?"

As it turned out, the Giant Squid did not appreciate being attacked with large blue bows, no matter how glamourous. After eying them with an air of weary reproach, it dived back underwater with a splash that soaked the two boys to the skin.

"I'm wet." Whimpered Peter, valiantly attempting to keep his teeth from chattering.

"Don't you worry Pete," James replied confidently, swaggering over as if he weren't drenched in slime and muddy loch-water. "I've seen my mum use this charm loads of times. Sure it can't be too difficult- it went something like this-"

"AAARGHH! AARGH!"

"OH SHIT SORRY-" James beat violently at the flames that were rapidly consuming his friend's sleeve, and when that proved useless, dragged him over to stick his arm into the water of the Lake. "Never happened before. Sorry about that. You alright?"

As he had nearly had his arm burnt off, and his clothing were now even more water-logged than before, it was perhaps understandable that it took Peter a moment to answer. But he seemed to have recovered reasonably quickly nonetheless, for his next words were not a complaint, but another suggestion. "Plant fight?"

This notion went down quite well, and within a few seconds the two boys were tearing about the lawn, flinging clumps of cherry blossom in each other's faces and stirring up piles of leaves with a flick of their wands. It was a game that did not require a great amount of skill, but, as with all games, James treated it with the same determination and competitive spirit with which he might have approached a Quidditch World Cup Final (he had even introduced a points system back in his first year). So when, after five minutes of hard-fought battle, Peter crawled out from beneath an assortment of twigs and foliage to offer his surrender, the ever-sporting Potter did not fail to rub it in.

"Ha! Thirty-five to fifteen! Did you really believe you could beat me? That was pathetic!"

Peter shrugged. He did not look particularly sorry to have been beaten and if anything he seemed more relieved that it was over. James was immediately suspicious; plant fights were one of the few things at which Peter excelled (though he would never tell him so) and he had hoped for a little visible irritation to sweeten his victory. It was another five minutes before he noticed the clump of goosegrass that had hooked itself onto his back- fifty points in one go.

"Why you little-" He was about to make a dive for the smirking Peter when suddenly an airy laugh brought him to his senses.

A gaggle of girls- mostly fourth years by the look of them, with the exception of Emmeline Vance- had trickled out of the front doors and down the steps to the lawn. Rita Skeeter was among them, but for once she did not appear to be monopolising the conversation. This honour fell instead, James noticed with a gulp, to Xia Lin, who was animatedly comparing the top speed of the new Comet 260 to the Nimbus line, an easy smile gracing her face. Immediately, he leapt to his feet, one hand flying to his hair as the other tried to loosen the claws of the goosegrass on his back.

James, according to his mother, was "going through a phase". According to James himself, it was love. It must be said that his father's observation, that his son was merely a "randy little twerp", was probably the more accurate, for love does not usually last a week, no matter how strong a thirteen year old's devotions may be. This week, the unwitting object of his affections was Xia Lin, who combined the two highly desirable qualities of being both extremely attractive and obsessed with Quidditch. A fortnight ago, it had been the fifth year Herbology genius and Witch Weekly model Isabeau Zabini, and before her the tough-as-nails Duelling Champion Cordelia Savage. At one point, there had even been a brief, embarrassing attraction to the young Defence Against the Dark Arts teacher, Branwen Corbie (which his friends had never let him live down).

James preened himself carefully as the girls passed, trying to act as if the fact that he had just had half the contents of the Lake emptied over his head and was also covered in cherry blossom and beech nuts didn't affect him in the slightest. To his dismay, Xia didn't seem to notice him as she argued over the importance of tail-clipping with her fellow Ravenclaw Chaser Lì Chang, but Skeeter slipped an arm through Vance's and began whispering gleefully, shooting him pointed glances. Vance looked impatient and tried to pull her away but Skeeter seemed to have her own ideas. As the bell rang for lunch, she sashayed over to stand in front of the boys, hands on hips, her expression accusatory.

"Potter, you look like you could use a woman's advice."

"Er no, thanks Rita but I'm fine-"

"Now don't fuss. It's quite obvious you're infatuated with Xia here. Why don't you just come out and say it to her?"

The rest of the Ravenclaw girls had paused now, looking around to see what was going on behind them. Xia Lin broke off her strictures on the different characteristics of Fleetwood's various broom waxes as Chang nudged her, and turned to stare at the scene curiously.

James flushed and scowled at Skeeter, but the girl only smiled sweetly and carried on loudly. "I knew you had good taste. Sylvie always said it was that Evans girl you had your eye on, but I knew-"

"Don't you start on that again, Skeeter," James growled warningly, his face scarlet. "Haven't you already caused enough damage?"

James hadn't thought or seen very much of Lily Evans of late, beyond watching Flitwick and Slughorn fawn over her in class. The irritating rumours that had caused such dislike between them the previous year had died down somewhat, and even before that, James had stopped antagonising her after the altercation they had had on the stairs. He had already been balancing feelings of shame against his frustration at the teasing which her proximity to him appeared to provoke, and after that particularly nasty argument, his guilty conscience had won out.

But for some reason, Evans did not appear to care much about, or even acknowledge the shift in his behaviour. When she had returned after Christmas of their second year, something about her had changed: she was more open, sharper, thicker-skinned, and much more her own person, rather than simply being her friend Snape's shadow. Mary MacDonald had mentioned something about her mother having passed away, but if Evans was upset about it, she did not let it ruin her determination to succeed or her interactions with others. And James wasn't cruel enough to interfere with that. The thought that Skeeter might kick up the same fuss about Xia made his stomach clench.

As noisy crowds of students began to flood out onto the grass around them, Rita Skeeter placed her hand over her mouth with a theatrical gasp. "Oh I'm so sorry, I didn't mean- are you still going out with Evans? Oh dear, that sounds like an awful pickle."

"What? No, I'm not-"

"Oh, really, I shouldn't have said anything. Only, well, poor _Lily_. And Xia, how must she feel-"

The look that Xia Lin was giving him would ordinarily have been enough to send James scuttling for the safety of his bedclothes, but for some reason he was no longer aware of her existence. It was Rita who had all his attention now- and not in a good way.

"Right Skeeter, that's enough," He snapped, interrupting her witterings on his non-existent relationship problems. "D'you get a kick out of making people miserable? Spread as many rumours as you like about me, but leave Evans out of it."

"Unless you want the pants hexed off you." Peter added from beside him, doing his best impression of Sirius' most devil-may-care attitude.

Skeeter merely sent him a withering look. "Really, Pettifer? You thought Gally Meadowes would go to Hogsmeade with _you_?"

Peter turned a light pink and muttered something about his name being Pettigrew as James leapt to his defence. "You leave him alone, Skeeter. Last I heard _you_ got turned down by _McLaggen_. Didn't know he had standards but-"

"For your information, it was the other way around. And besides, do you think I don't know about your friend Lupin?"

"What's that supposed to mean?" James was seized by a sudden panic. _How could she possibly know?_

"Oh just that, with his _condition, _I'd be surprised if any girl went near him-"

Any kind of noble ideas James had about not jinxing a girl were thrown out of the window as he made a grab for his wand and the girls shrieked. Peter tugged on his arm, and Skeeter dived behind Vance, who had been edging further and further away from the conversation, looking furtive. They had acquired a small audience now; Lì Chang was yelling for her prefect brother and Tiberius McLaggen was shoving his way through the crowd, pulling out his wand.

"You going to defend her McLaggen? Go on then, make my day."

"Don't be such a fool, Potter. If you were more of a gentleman-"

"What's Skeeter then, a lady? She's a bloody insect and you know it-" James was pleasantly surprised to find out that McLaggen was fool enough to be easily riled into throwing the first hex. He laughed, deflecting it lightly as the word "Fight!" echoed around the grounds and students everywhere pricked up their ears hopefully.

"Come on, you can do better than that!"

McLaggen was much bigger than James, and it wasn't long before he decided to put that weight to good use, throwing away his wand and rugby tackling him with such force that James couldn't do much other than take the punches that followed. Luckily, unlike McLaggen, he still had his wand and, after the third blow to the head, was finally able to gasp out a spell.

"_Impedimenta!"_

There was a loud bang and the other Gryffindor was thrown backwards. James scrambled to his knees, groping for his glasses. The crowd was pressing round them eagerly, some taking bets about who would win whilst others pointed and gasped over James' bloody nose and McLaggen's torn robes. Somewhere, Wei Chang was trying to keep order but in the absence of any other prefects, he wasn't having much luck.

McLaggen was struggling to his feet, fuming like an angry bull, but James shot another jinx in his direction, and he dived back to the ground. The jinx missed, scattering a group of first years, but James paid no attention to their squeals, nor to Peter's frantic attempts to draw him away. A fight was just what he needed to liven up his afternoon, he had decided, and now he had McLaggen exactly where he wanted him. He raised his wand again…

"THAT'S ENOUGH! DO YOU HEAR ME? ENOUGH!"

James jumped several feet into the air as someone bellowed loudly in his ear and a flash of red hair burst into the space between him and the furious McLaggen. It took him a moment to realise that the small figure holding the two of them apart was none other than Lily Evans herself and he dropped his wand, slightly shocked at the power of her lungs.

McLaggen quickly took advantage of James' incapacitation, sneaking a Jelly-Legs Jinx at him which Peter barely pulled him out of the way of in time. Evans, however, was having none of this.

"Give us that." She demanded, snatching McLaggen's wand away from him and, with a flick of her own, summoning James' from the ground. Both boys made noises of complaint but another bark from Evans silenced them. "Stop clarting about! I expected it from you Potter, but really Tiberius! Weren't you hoping to be made a prefect?"

McLaggen had the good grace to look slightly ashamed of himself. James, on the other hand, could do nothing other than stare at Evans. He'd never seen a fellow student control a crowd with such ease; had _he_ shouted like at such a motley crew, they'd probably have eaten him for breakfast. And yet here was Lily Evans, not yet five feet in height and usually so quiet, holding court over a group of frankly terrifying fight-lovers, who not two minutes ago had been baying for his blood, with all the effortless confidence of an Amazon queen leading her army into battle.

"Now," Continued Hippolyta reborn, her face disturbingly pale and stony in contrast to the fire of her hair. "Can you be trusted to behave like civilised human beings, and not chuffing great baboons?"

Rather dazedly, James nodded. McLaggen, looking suitably chastened, stretched out a hand. "Sorry old man, don't know what got into me."

"No problem." James muttered, patting his hand awkwardly, his eyes still fixed on the green-eyed angel in front of him. Evans, for her part, spared him little more than a glance. "Good. Both of you bugger off then." She tossed their wands back to them and turned away to deal with the crowd. "Alright, I think you've all seen quite enough. Move along please."

And with a kingly swish of her robes she was gone, taking an equally shocked-looking Severus Snape with her.

* * *

James gazed after her for what seemed like an age, mesmerised by the flame-like strands of red hair floating in the breeze as she moved off towards the Lake. Who was Xia Lin? A fleeting infatuation. And what of the nearly three years of animosity between him and Lily Evans? A mere technicality. They were meant for each other, it was plain to him now. Such poise, such imperious grace, such eloquent Brummie tones- how had he never seen it before?

Eventually, he became aware of a light tugging at his sleeve and Peter's voice penetrated his senses. "James, mate, you alright?"

James turned slowly to grin at his friend, though the strange glint in his eye did not fill the smaller boy with comfort. "Alright? I'm perfectly alright Pete. I," Here he paused for effect, rather wishing he had some sort of trumpet fanfare to accompany his announcement. "I am in love."

For a moment, Peter looked very confused. And then a look of incredulity passed across his face, followed swiftly by yet more confusion. "You don't- you're not- do you _fancy_ Evans?"

"I do not fancy her," James replied indignantly. "I am in love_. Love_, Petey. You just wait 'til it happens to you. You'll understand then."

Peter didn't seem to know what to do with this information, and to tell the truth, James was having trouble digesting it himself, hence the dreamlike trance. Somehow though, his friend managed to usher the starry-eyed boy back up the steps and into the castle. Lunch was not yet over and with students milling everywhere Peter had a hard time keeping track of his charge, who would wander off at every opportunity to gaze out of the windows at the sky and admire the flowers in the paintings, muttering to himself about hearts and souls and poetry. Struggling under the weight of both James' bag and his own, he finally succeeded, however, in guiding his charge up the stairs to the Gryffindor third year boys' dormitory, where the other half of their quartet sat sprawled on the floor, finishing off a large bar of Honeydukes' finest dark chocolate.

"Thought you were in detention?" Peter panted, as he dumped James' bag on top of an all too happy-looking Sirius.

"He decided it wasn't worth it." Remarked Remus, who was flipping anxiously through a pile of scabby old tomes with such snappy titles as, "Man or Mouse? A study in the comparative assessment of animal transfiguration, with a particular review of the question of sentience and self-control in the case of cephalopods".

"Oi that's not fair, I just had a brilliant idea about how to deal with Remus' furry little problem and thought it was a bit more important than writing lines for McGonagall."

"It is not a brilliant idea. It is a highly dangerous and not to mention completely _illegal_ idea."

"Why are you looking it up then?"

"Because you couldn't be bothered to do your own reading. And because if you're going to do it- and I'm sure you'll try- I don't want to be held responsible for any tails or crocodile heads you give yourself."

"Hey, I resemble that remark! You worry too much Remus, we'll be- what's up with him?" James had collapsed onto his bed with a happy sigh and was now humming quietly to himself. Sirius eyed him curiously. "James, mate? Where'd you get that black eye? And why are you so wet? You ok?"

"Yeahhh…"

Remus raised an eyebrow in Peter's direction and the boy shrugged. "I dunno, he just- one moment he was fighting McLaggen and the next he's going on about how he fancies Evans-"

"I do _not_ fancy her, I am in love with her," James reiterated fiercely. "And her name," Here he let out another deep sigh. "Is _Lily."_

There was a pause and then Sirius let out a roar of disbelief. "What? Tell me you're joking!" He clutched at his friend's leg pleadingly. "James, who did this to you? Did McLaggen hex you? Was it that Skeeter bint? Say something, anything!"

"I'm in love with Lily Evans." James repeated firmly. Sirius threw up his hands and buried his face in the bedclothes. "No, no, no, no, no-"

Remus, on the other hand, was rather less surprised. Exchanging a glance with Peter, he snorted and returned to his book. "I give it a week."

But, though by morning James had shaken himself out of his trance and regained something of his old composure, the infatuation with Lily Evans did not disappear as quickly as Remus had expected. A year later, true to Emmeline Vance's prophecy, he was even to be found howling over her picture, having consumed enough of Rhonabwy's Rum to kill a concrete Erumpment. James Potter was officially a lost cause.

* * *

.

"Ouch, slow down will you? You'll wreck my hair! Sylvie!"

"_Don't_ call me that," Emmeline hissed through gritted teeth as she dragged the gossip-loving fourth year into an empty classroom by the arm and turned to face her, fuming. "Just _what_, exactly, did you think you were doing?"

"I don't know what you mean," Rita wrenched her arm out of her friend's grasp and patted her hair haughtily. "I was only trying to help and Potter lost the plot. Poor boy, it must be mummy issues or something. Mind you, I really ought to be complimenting _you_. Well done for getting Evans to see him fighting, seemed to give him just what he needed-"

"Bollocks," Emmeline snorted, ignoring her prattle. "You weren't trying to help. You've never tried to help in your life. It's all just a game to you, isn't it? Stirring the pot so you can get a good laugh at us all stewing and be the first to tell everyone if we boil over. You don't give a damn about Xia, or Lily, or McLaggen, or any of us- only the drama you can enjoy by association."

"Now that's not true Sylvie, of course I care about you. And don't you think Tiberius standing up for me like that was very brave? A pity I turned him down really, but I just can't stand the thought of those study sessions he wants to go to, and they're not the fun kind-"

"You shut your face for once and listen." Emmeline snarled. "All that carry-on about Lupin. You keep your cake-hole shut about him, you hear? Or I'll give you such a clatter you'll wake up in St Mungo's."

"_You?_" Rita had sounded less scathing about Peter Pettigrew's chances, but Emmeline wasn't so easily cowed. "Aye, me. And what's more, when you finally come out of intensive care, you'll find out that every single one of your deepest darkest secrets is all over the school."

The blonde simply sighed. "Oh Sylvia, you're so funny. I know you wouldn't do that to _me_. Not unless you wanted everyone to find out what you and that Macmillan girl were doing in the library last week. I'm sure it would be terrible if it were to slip out…"

"Really?" Emmeline's eyes glittered. "Try me. Who do you think's got more to lose- you or me? Do you want to find out? Maybe I'll get that little notebook of yours and leave it on McGonagall's desk- see what she thinks."

"You wouldn't," Rita scoffed, though she was starting to look a little scared now. "You _couldn't_. I could _destroy _you-"

"No, you couldn't," Emmeline laughed harshly, sinking into a chair. "You really think you're something don't you, Rita? Well here's news for you- I'm not scared one bit. You say a single word about Lupin, and you'll find out what's really scary. I keep my promises, see."

Rita's nostrils flared and she glared at her for a moment, her mouth twisting in to an ugly expression. Then she leapt to her feet and pointed to the door imperiously. "Fine then. You want to leave? Leave."

"Nah, I'm going nowhere Skeeter," Emmeline swung back on the chair's hind legs, her feet resting on the table and twirling her wand between her fingers. "This time you can walk away. Get out."

Rita hesitated, and for a moment Emmeline was slightly frightened that her intimidation tactics hadn't worked, that the other girl was simply going to refuse. But she kept her mouth shut; if she had to tell Rita to leave more than once it would look weak.

Eventually the blonde seemed to come to a conclusion and slowly, stiffly, she turned and walked out of the classroom, slamming the door behind her. Emmeline let out a sigh of relief and buried her face in her hands, suppressing the urge to laugh hysterically. She was her own person at last.

* * *

.

_**Quite a long chapter this time, sorry! But there was a lot of ground to cover. And I hope Emmeline's change of heart didn't seem too sudden, but there didn't seem much I could do to make the transition smoother.**_

_**Still, hope it wasn't too awful!**_

_**Title of chapter from for Gerry Rafferty's 1978 song of the same name.**_


	4. Hammer to Fall

_**Author's note: Trigger warning for physical assault and (technically) torture, as well as attempt of a character to make a slur against someone based on their sexuality.**_

* * *

.

_**Hammer to Fall: March 1976**_

"And then Primrose stands up and says to Dumbledore- _Dumbledore_ himself you know- and she says, 'I'm sorry sir, but I just thought that it was the perfect time to do a spot of midnight fishing. And I was so tired I got lost and mistook the baths for the lake and, well, when the line tugged, I knew I'd caught a whopper'." Lily finished in a half-whisper, her mouth curving upwards into a smirk as she set to work on repotting a sorry-looking Fanged Geranium, unaware of the earth spilling everywhere in her happy daze.

Severus Snape, on the other hand, merely gave a non-committal grunt. It seemed that tales of Primrose Brown's nocturnal activities, whether she had really been fishing in the prefect bathroom or doing something rather less savoury, did not particularly interest him.

Lily's face fell. "Oh come on, you could at least _try_ to look interested. That was the highlight of my morning, you know."

Severus shrugged. "I just don't see why it's so funny. You don't even like Brown."

"I do so," Lily countered indignantly. "I just don't know her very well. And besides, it was still the best excuse I've heard in years. Mind you, I won't be using _that_ bathroom again in a hurry." She added, wrinkling her nose. "I bet it was that Macmillan she was with, dirty sod. He always did seem a bit too good to be true."

Seeing that she had still failed to coax a smile from her friend, she sighed and placed her hands on the table, leaning forward."Go on then, what's wrong?"

"Nothing," Severus said hastily but he soon gave in at the sight of Lily's disbelieving expression. "Look it's just- well, there's been some talk lately, in the Common Room. Nothing serious, just boasting mostly, but I thought…look, you should just be careful alright?"

Lily returned to wrestling the geranium into the earth as it snapped at her fingers, carefully schooling her face into a blank expression.

"Let me guess, Mulciber?" She remarked in a manner which she hoped sounded offhand.

"No," Severus snapped defensively, avoiding her gaze. "Just… some seventh years. Yeah, Rowle and Gibbon and their lot."

Lily was unconvinced but did not push the matter. She worried increasingly about her friend lately. Every day he seemed more furtive, jumpy, and ill at ease, avoiding her questions and only half-listening to her attempts at striking up a friendly conversation.

Watching his face intently, she was not surprised to find his eyes flitting frequently in the direction of James Potter and his small gang as they tackled their geraniums enthusiastically, for once focused on the lesson and not causing havoc. She put that down to Lupin's absence; the boys were always concerned whenever their friend was ill- it was one of their few redeeming features. Black looked particularly green, though that was probably just because a lacewing fly had emerged from the sack of compost he was opening and flown straight into his mouth. Pettigrew was trying very hard to stifle his laughter as Professor Sprout bustled past, but Potter was gazing at Lily, a far-away look in his eyes and seemingly unaware of the geranium chomping away contentedly at his thumb.

Lily forced her eyes back onto her geranium, her face brick-red with anger. Sometimes she thought she could live with Potter's unfortunate habit of existing, if only because he could occasionally be quite funny and his Quidditch skills were the only thing keeping Gryffindor in the running for the House Cup at the moment. But most days she rather wished he'd never been born.

Severus, though, was rather more interested in the Gryffindor boys than Lily. "Lupin's not here again." He muttered, half to himself but with a slight glance in her direction, as if trying to gauge her reaction.

Lily decided that she didn't have time for _that_ particular conversation today and made a vague noise as she picked up her quill and began to take notes. "Mm, yes. By the way, is it true that Rowle's father is being investigated again? It was in the papers this morning. Apparently an Auror was killed."

Her friend looked a bit put-out and shrugged again, returning to his work. Even so, he continued to steal glances at the Gryffindor boys for the rest of the lesson, Potter having been brought to his senses by Black spitting a lacewing carcass into his hair and yelling in pain and horror as he realised the bloody mess his geranium had made of his thumb. Eventually, Professor Sprout hauled the vicious flower away and sent him off to the hospital wing. Pettigrew followed anxiously at his heels as if he were Potter's pet dog, who had instead been left behind to listen to Sprout berating him for spilling compost all over the greenhouse floor, hands in pockets and face surly.

Lily and Severus did not exchange another word until the bell rang for lunch and, after muttering a distracted excuse, the Slytherin boy slung his bag over his shoulder and hurried away, nearly bowling over Mary MacDonald in his haste but not bothering to apologise. Lily watched him go with a concerned frown and then, picking up her own things, tried to shrug it off. She'd tackle him about it later, right now she needed food.

* * *

.

After gobbling down some sardines in the Great Hall, she set off on a walk, wrapping her scarf over her mouth and nose to keep out the bitter cold. There would be a hard frost in the morning- that she was sure of- but for the moment the grounds were still water-logged after a fortnight's heavy rain and she squelched through the mud contentedly, the fresh air putting a smile back on her face. Circling the lake she found herself back at the greenhouses but, rather than being there to check on her geranium, she settled herself on a large flat rock by the water and, after glancing around furtively, pulled a tattered paperback from her bag. It had become almost a daily habit of hers to sit and read outside during her lunch hour and even the cold weather could not deter her once she had got her teeth into a good novel.

Though she was really too old for it, the book of the day was not, as some might have expected from the guilty way she pulled it from her bag, the shocking 'Scales and Serpents' (banned by the Ministry for indecency, but somehow everyone seemed to have read it anyway) nor a forbidden tome on dark enchantments. Instead it was simply a muggle children's book- 'Danny the Champion of the World', by Roald Dahl. Though it was rather less fantastical than the last few of Dahl's books she had been able to get her hands on, she was definitely enjoying it so far. Its far more realistic setting and focus on the little injustices of life attracted her sense of fairness and social conscience: though she was proud of her prefects' badge, Lily couldn't quite suppress the little voice in her head that yelled 'Smash the system!' whenever she spied a good person being used as a doormat. And she had also found Dahl's comparison of men to bullfrogs deeply amusing. It was a lesson which boys like Potter and Black, and maybe even Severus to some extent (though she hated to admit it) would do well to pay attention to.

After what seemed like an age, Lily finally raised her head from her book. The Giant Squid had surfaced at least twice since she had begun reading, snatching birds out of the air and dragging them down into the icy depths of the lake. She seemed to have been outside for a very long time, and wondered if the bell had gone without her noticing it. But no, there was Black, pacing angrily back and forth across the grass by the front steps, and even he wasn't stupid enough to bunk off Transfiguration, not so long as Minerva McGonagall was the teacher…

After a moment, slowly tuning herself back into the sounds of the world, Lily became aware that a small commotion was taking place somewhere nearby. For a brief moment she thought she heard someone shouting and then the voice stopped, being replaced first by a series of loud thuds and then silence. Dropping the book back into her bag, she clambered to her feet and looked around, brow furrowed in confusion. Had it just been a fox? Or maybe a Venomous Tentacula, claiming for its next victim a sparrow that had been unlucky enough to flutter through the open windows of Greenhouse Three? Or perhaps Hagrid was exercising his new boarhound puppies, Quaffle and Bludger, in the woods again?

Yes, she decided, as a loud rustling noise met her ears, rather as if something were running through the trees at the edge of the Forest. That was probably it. She should really go back inside in case she missed the start of Transfiguration… but she had been longing to meet the puppies ever since she had heard about them and, as a loud yelp seemed to confirm her suspicions, she hopped off the stone and wandered past the Greenhouses towards the tall pines.

It was only as she drew nearer that she began to realise that, rather than the source of the odd noises being two adorable yet clumsy puppies, something much stranger was going on. It was difficult to see through the dark pine trees that crowded together, their sharp branches twisting into each other to form a near impenetrable wall, but somebody was definitely moving in there- perhaps several somebodies- and occasionally an indistinguishable mutter of voices spilled through to the edge of the forest.

Lily hesitated. There was, after all, a reason that the forest was forbidden. She tried to force herself to turn back but, just as she managed to unstick her feet from the muddy ground, there was a loud stream of angry cursing and a streak of blue light ricocheted off the tree closest to her head. She ducked, panicking, but soon realised that the spell had not been aimed at her. This, it seemed, was all that her brain needed to throw all caution to the wind and let her curiosity get the better of her; before she even realised that her legs were moving, she had plunged into the forest, ignoring the knotted branches as they stung her cheeks and carefully picking her way through the undergrowth in the direction of the noise.

It was the Gryffindor scarf she saw first, flashing red and gold under the dark shadows of the trees. Then wispy blonde hair and a pale, panicked face, as another jet of light caught its owner in the stomach and two, horribly familiar voices roared with laughter.

"Didn't you listen to Sprout, MacDonald? The better the soil the faster they grow! You must have some pretty thick mud for blood!"

Horrified, Lily could not tear her eyes away from her classmate as strong green vines seemed to shoot out of Mary MacDonald's shoulder blades, wrapping around her neck and squeezing until Lily thought that the other girl surely must turn blue. Meanwhile, the ends of the creepers, sharp and cruel, clawed at her face and arms, scrabbling and scratching until they drew red droplets from the skin that ran down her cheeks like tears. And all the time, her tormentors kept laughing, breathless and excited and childish, as if Mary's torture were nothing more than the bubbles conjured from a parent's wand to amuse them as infants.

"They're hungry, MacDonald! Not enough mud in there?" Fingal Avery roared heartily, grinning like a fool.

Aidan Mulciber was less overcome by delight and narrowed his eyes, as hungry as the vines his friend had conjured. "Maybe you should get some more. Go on, there's plenty around." He said softly and, strode over to his victim, grabbing Mary's hair with one hand and digging out a handful of the wet mud from the ground with the other. "Not going to eat? Thought you'd be used to it, mudblood."

With a sudden vicious movement, he tipped the hand with the mud in it over Mary's mouth, covering it with his palm as he forced the sludge down her throat. A few seconds later, however he let out a scream of pain and sprang away as the poor girl fell forward onto her hands and retched.

"Coward," She finally managed to choke out, spitting mud everywhere. "You're a bloody c-coward, you c-"

The rest of her words were lost as Avery flicked his wand casually and the vines appeared again, crawling up her neck towards her mouth. Mulciber, nursing his bitten hand furiously, turned towards her again, raising his own wand threateningly. But Mary's voice had somehow jerked Lily out of her daze and, suddenly realising that this was not just some kind of awful nightmare, she leapt into action. "DON'T TOUCH HER!"

The two Slytherins whipped around, both drawing their wands and Lily checked herself, forcing her temper under control. Without turning her back to them, she strode straight past, trying to appear as calm as possible. This lack of fear or aggressiveness served, as intended, to unnerve the boys and, rather than hexing her, Avery only sneered unconvincingly. "Another mudblood? What are you going to do, Evans? Tattle to McGonagall?"

"That's exactly what I'm going to do!" Lily snapped back, trying her best to make herself seem scary as she knelt down next to her fellow Gryffindor and drew her wand. "_Diffindo."_

As the vines around Mary's legs began to retract and Lily moved her wand up to deal with the tendrils attacking the girl's neck, she continued brusquely. "An illegal assault on another pupil? Do you honestly think you're going to get away with this? _Diffindo._ I swear, if you don't get out of here now I'll take it to the Minister for Magic him- oh!"

Free from her bonds, Mary MacDonald had shoved her way past Lily and was making for Avery with all the ferocity of an angry bull. To her amazement, the blonde girl then delivered a stunning right hook straight to his jaw, with such force that he fell backwards, dazed. This Mary followed up with a casual kick to the face, knocking the Slytherin flat on his back with such cool disdain that it ought to have made her ancestors proud, both Glaswegian and Gael alike. Then, to round off neatly, she stamped viciously on his torso, and Lily was sure that she heard something snap as Avery let out a whimper.

Mulciber gave a roar of fury as his crony gasped in pain, nose gushing blood and eyes glazed. Turning his wand back on Mary, he easily sent her flying back into a tree with a bang and then spun back to Lily, who fumbled for her own wand desperately as he began to utter a curse. "Cru-"

"Oi, Mulciber- heads up!" A second loud bang echoed through the forest as the Slytherin glanced round, only to catch a stinging jinx full in the mouth. Emmeline Vance's eyes glittered as she watched him howl in pain, standing straight-backed and motionless, her normally giggling face haughty and cold as any professional duellist's.

Lily didn't wonder at her sudden appearance and nor did she wait for Mulciber to recover the power of speech. Snatching his wand out of his hand, she instead grabbed his ear and bellowed into it. "If you e_ver_ touch a muggle-born again, I'll lamp you so hard you'll be talking Gobbledegook for the rest of your life! Got that? I _said_, got that?"

It seemed to cause him a extreme pain (whether because of the stinging jinx or the thought of a mudblood touching him) but eventually Mulciber nodded. Breathing a sigh of relief, Lily let go of his ear and gave him a shove. "Get out of my sight then, you little shit. I said GET OUT!"

"Oi, that means you too!" Vance gave Avery's body a light kick. "Oi! Damn- Mulciber take your little boyfriend with you too. Or I'll stick that wand of yours so far up your arse-"

Aidan Mulciber did not need telling a third time and, helping his near fainting friend up from the ground staggered away from them towards the edge of the forest. His face was swollen and bruised, and Avery looked as if he'd come off worst in a fight with a dragon, but even the sight of Lily's tight-lipped countenance and Vance's wand couldn't quite crush him, it seemed. "A pair of mudbloods and a lesbo?" He spat, struggling to drag Avery away. "Is that all you scum have got? You just wait-"

"Wait for what?" Lily barked, as Vance started forward. "Was that a threat I heard? Are you threatening me, Mulciber? Would you like me to snap this wand in half right now and save Dumbledore the job?"

The Slytherin snarled and looked very much as if he wanted to tear her throat out with his bare hands. But it was clear even to him that he was outmatched and, with one last hateful glance in her direction, he backed away from her flashing eyes and stumbled away through the trees.

* * *

.

"Well," Vance grinned nastily after the retreating Slytherin. "That was easier than I expected. Cowards."

Lily was about to add some choice expletives to this comment but, just as she opened her mouth, a faint whimper from behind the two girls drew their attention back to Mary, who was struggling under the weight of a huge mass of green cords. Alarmed, both girls sprinted towards her, and Lily knelt down to attempt to stem the flow of blood on her face as Vance set about severing the tendrils again.

"How on earth did this happen?" She couldn't stop herself from asking as she handed the bruised and battered girl a handkerchief with which to wipe off the worst of the mud and blood from her face.

"Yeah, I heard that bitch Wilkes laughing about it in the Great Hall," Vance added, frowning in concern. "You're lucky Evans was here. But I don't understand- how'd they get you?"

Shaking her wrists loose, it took Mary a moment to answer as she scrubbed at her cheeks furiously, screwing up her face in an obvious effort not to cry.

Eventually, she spat out a mouthful of dirt. "Avery. Bastard said he'd found something new about the 'Twelve near the Forest. He asked for help the other week, you know when that essay on goblin rebellions was due," She added, seeing the confusion on their faces. "I didn't think anything of it. I mean, 1612 was such an important year and-"

She stopped short, scowling. "Don't look at me like that."

"We're not-" Lily began lamely. "I just meant- oh, Mary_-_"

"What Evans means to say is we're not blaming you," Vance tried, tentatively. "It's just- you've always been so trusting…"

"Aye, well I can see it was bloody daft now," There had never been such venom in Mary's voice before. "But… look, I ken I'm nae good at magic. I suppose I just thought it was nice to be able to help someone for a change. And the Slytherins have never paid much attention to me before so I didn't think. That's all. Sorry about getting you both into this mess."

Lily suddenly felt immensely guilty and immediately tried to rectify her mistake. "No, it's not your fault. You weren't stupid at all- you're one of the nicest people I know. If Mulciber and Avery think they can take advantage of that-"

"-they're evil bastards, like you said." Vance finished earnestly, cutting swiftly through a new vine as it sprouted from Mary's left wrist. Then she grinned wickedly. "Mind you, Avery's face when you hit him-"

Here she did a rather comical impression of a dying troll.

"_Don't,_" Mary reproached her, but she was clearly trying very hard not to laugh. "I shouldn't have gone for him. Now I'll be the one who gets in trouble. And oh jings, you hexed Mulciber-"

Vance's face fell at that and the two sat in glum silence, contemplating their fates.

Lily frowned and folded her arms.

"Now both of you listen to me," She began sternly, in her best prefect voice. "Neither of you are going to get in trouble for what happened here, not if I have anything to do with it. Mary, it was self-defence, and Vance was quite right to help, seeing as I was too stupid to get to my wand in time. McGonagall will see that, she's got to. And if she doesn't, I'll take it to Dumbledore himself. Who are they going to believe? Two miniature Death Eaters or a prefect? And besides, you're quite trustworthy yourself Mary- I'm sure they'll take you seriously. If you decide to tell them, that is." She finished, anxious to make sure that the other girl knew that she was under no obligation.

But she needn't have worried.

"Course I'm going to tell them," The blonde said matter-of-factly, gritting her teeth. She struggled to her feet, only to topple backwards as a vine suddenly shot out from her ankle and tripped her. "Actually, maybe I'd better go see Pomfrey first."

Then, after a moment's thought, she added quietly. "Maybe I'll leave telling them a bit too." She shook her head. "No- if they attack someone else-"

"It won't be your fault," Lily said firmly as Vance threw Mary's arm around her shoulders and helped her to her feet. Lily followed as they set off out of the Forest, casting severing charms whenever a root seemed likely to sprout. "And with the mess you made of Avery's face, he won't be going anywhere soon. Anyway, you could spread it around a bit, couldn't you Vance? You don't have to mention Mary's name, but just warn people not to trust Mulciber or any of that lot? Then Mary can tell them whenever she's ready."

"Gladly," Vance said cheerfully, as a tendril smacked her across the face. She hesitated for a moment and then asked quietly. "What about- does that mean- but er, your friend Snape-"

Lily's jaw clenched. "Don't worry," She muttered grimly. "I'll speak to Severus."

* * *

.

But that evening Severus Snape was nowhere to be found and by the next morning Gryffindor Tower had been thrown into such a tizzy that it was impossible to focus on anything without being distracted by the whispered conversations over breakfast. By lunchtime, the talk had spread to the rest of the school and it was only then that Lily began to form some kind of vague idea of what was going on. There had been more Death Eater attacks the previous day- even one on a family with a small child, though thankfully the family dog had been the only fatality- and for some this was the important news. But Hogwarts had never been good at prioritising gossip, and in actuality the main headline of the day was the strange fact that Sirius Black appeared, quite decisively, to have been sent to Coventry by his friends. Nobody seemed entirely sure as to why and the fact that whatever he had done had landed him in detention for the rest of the year was nothing new. Normally, though, Potter would have been in there with him, and theories abounded as to the cause of the rift between the two, formerly inseparable, friends. Was it politics? Girl trouble? Had Black broken Potter's beloved Comet 260?

Some of the more enlightened (those who had bothered to glance out of a window at some point the previous night) were making noises about the Whomping Willow. Apparently, Bertha Jorkins had seen James Potter arguing (and, some said, wrestling) with Severus Snape near the volatile tree, and of course once Bertha Jorkins knew, then so did Rita Skeeter and, by teatime, the whole school. This new information threw more questions into the mix: what could possibly have passed between Potter and Snape that would turn the former against his best friend? Were the two events even connected? The school gossips turned detective with alarming speed, but despite their best efforts, they were unable to dredge up any more clues.

Lily, having been made aware of Severus' possible involvement by a loud-mouthed first year, was now finding it twice as difficult to track her friend down. Wednesday passed without a sighting, as Severus did not turn up for Herbology in first period, their only class together that day. But they had Potions on Thursday, and surely he wouldn't miss that? If he did, she would simply have to find a way of breaking into the Slytherin Common Room and dragging him out, Lily thought wryly, as she trudged up the stairs at the end of the day. They had to talk, and he couldn't avoid her forever.

In between all this rumour-mongering and fruitless searching, Lily had also to find the time to visit the unfortunate Mary MacDonald, currently a hostage in the hospital wing as Madam Pomfrey fussed over her anxiously. As she opened the door quietly and slipped inside, Lily noticed with relief that the invalid was sitting up in bed, fit enough again to look mildly disgruntled at her incapacitation as she struggled to complete her Charms homework. Emmeline Vance was also present, lounging in the bedside chair with her feet propped up on Mary's covers and flipping lazily through a copy of 'Witch Weekly' that claimed, amongst other things, to hold the secret of "What he's really thinking". This was unlikely, Lily thought, given that the answer seemed to be some drivel about deep conversations among the roses and public displays of affection, and Vance seemed to agree with her, for upon her entrance, she gladly discarded the rag and gave her a disarmingly friendly smile. "Thank Merlin it's you. You're clever, can you help Mary with her Charms work? I think she's about to implode."

"Sorry." Mary muttered, biting her lip, but Lily shrugged. "Don't worry, I can give it a go, though I can't promise I'll be any good at it either."

She was rewarded by the look of relief that broke across the injured girl's face. "Can you? It would help loads, Flitwick's always giving you points in Charms. I just can't seem to focus."

Lily settled herself on the end of the bed and took up the sorry-looking essay the other girl handed to her. "How are you anyroad?" She asked, as she placed neat dots next to the mistakes with her quill. "How long does Pomfrey think you'll be in here?"

"Well, she fixed the cuts pretty quickly," Mary rolled up the right sleeve of her jumper to reveal her lower arm, no longer bruised, but marked by faint white criss-crossing scars. "And she's got me on a course of some kind of pickled Murtlap solution for those weird vines, which tastes minging- oh." She broke off as, right on cue, a pair of weak-looking green tendrils snaked out of her hands and wrapped themselves together.

Lily reached for her wand, ready to perform another severing charm, but Vance put out a hand. "Pomfrey said that using magic only made them stronger. Pass us a scissors."

"A _pair_ of scissors." Lily muttered quietly, unable to stop herself.

Vance looked more than a little irritated. "It's a dual number, Miss 'I speak English like I've just come up a coal mine on my way to the Queen's garden party'." She snapped, snatching the scissors from the bed and setting to work on the vines.

Lily couldn't stop herself from turning red; she'd forgotten, in their mutual concern for their classmate, that she and Vance had never quite seen eye to eye and wondered whether or not to apologise. _Still, it's not my fault if we don't get along, _a voice in her head pointed out indignantly. _If her friend Skeeter hadn't started those rumours in second year… _Lily simply scowled and returned to marking the parchment.

But Mary seemed to find the situation a little tiring.

"Don't squabble," She grumbled, though without much real anger. "Or I'll have the baith of youse thrown out. And I'd hate to do that, seeing as you're my only contact with the outside world for as long as Pomfrey wants to keep me locked up here. Tell me, what's all this I heard about Black? Potter and Pettigrew were in here last night- and that Snape kid as well- but Pomfrey had a silencing charm round them. What did the gowks do now?"

Mary MacDonald had never been one to dither around the point; she was unfailingly blunt and truthful, something which did not often endear her to people (Aidan Mulciber being a prime example). This was basically the only thing Lily knew about the girl, other than the fact that she was the only person capable of staying awake in History of Magic, and was able to give a thirty second run-down of every episode of the muggle television programme 'Z-Cars' that had ever aired. Ordinarily, Lily would not have given a flying Flobberworm about Sirius Black's private life, but Mary _was_ ill and should be obliged, something which Emmeline Vance seemed only too happy to do.

"He's in the doghouse- Black that is," She volunteered, looking much more cheerful as she exchanged the copy of Witch Weekly for the day's issue of the Daily Prophet, which Madam Pomfrey had left at the end of the bed. "Nobody knows what he's done but it must have been something pretty bad- nothing gets between Potter and his mates, you know. I heard that Black's been having an affair with Severus Snape or something, but that sounds like complete bollocks-"

Lily wasn't sure whether to laugh or vomit, so settled for a derisive snort. "Yes, well that's just Rita Skeeter being a featherhead as usual. I can assure you, Sev is _not_ having an affair with Black."

"Ah well, she always was a complete eejit," Vance shrugged, grinning. "Still, I don't know why they'd be up here. Maybe they came to see Remus? He's ill at the moment isn't he?"

"Well that's just it, he can't be- he wasn't here last night," Mary said, frowning thoughtfully. "Not until about six in the morning, at least. I know. I was awake the whole time."

Lily suddenly felt very uncomfortable and Vance was wearing an odd expression on her face. The two girls each caught the other's eye and Lily had a sneaking suspicion that she was not the only one with a theory as to Lupin's absence.

After a moment, Vance coughed. "Well, I'm not surprised you were awake," She said to Mary, jerking her head at the bed in the corner, which currently housed a comatose Avery. "I wouldn't sleep if he was in with me."

"I still can't believe Madam Pomfrey put him anywhere near you," Lily hissed forcefully, grateful for the distraction. "I thought you said you told her a bit about what happened?"

"I did, but we've only got one hospital wing," Mary smiled wistfully and let out a strange giggle. "Apparently I broke a couple of ribs and they're worried something might have been punctured. Can you believe it? All that magic and it was a boot-" But seeing their worried faces, she cleared her throat and continued in a more sober voice. "Still, don't worry, Pomfrey's been keeping him pretty quiet on sleeping draughts. I don't know if there's actually anything wrong with him, but I'm quite glad she's not letting him out yet. She thinks they'll both be in detention until they rot- that is, if they're not expelled, but that takes hearings and witnesses and not to mention the school board, who probably owe Avery's father everything. I'd have to be questioned and I don't know how much help McGonagall would be-"

Mary broke off, suddenly looking very overwhelmed and distressed, and buried herself in her book again. Vance pulled the crossword out of the Daily Prophet and tossed the rest of the paper back onto the bed. Lily, having finished annotating Mary's homework, picked it up. Neither girl was willing to tackle Mary about the incident any further, and so, instead, she turned her attention to the news of the day, trying to ignore the sickening jolt in her stomach as she read the list of names printed in small dark ink. Some were muggles, others squibs or half-bloods, most were muggleborns involved in some way with the Ministry of Magic. Cresswell, Rycote, Boyd, Fenwick, Tonks… She wondered if, one day, 'Evans' would be there too. Perhaps if they hadn't found Mary in time it would have been 'MacDonald' as well.

Eventually, Madam Pomfrey appeared, flapping her hands in such a violent manner that Lily and Emmeline both leapt to their feet without delay.

Tipping a dozen or so chocolate frogs out of her robe pockets, Vance grinned reassuringly at Mary. "Don't worry, you'll be out of here soon. And we'll visit again tomorrow, won't we Evans?"

"Oh, yes," Lily smiled at the girl as well, though she didn't feel quite as at ease as she looked. "If you need that Charms stuff checked again, just ask. And if there's any bother," She added in a lower tone, glancing pointedly at Avery. "We'll sort him for you."

"Yeah, we make a good team, don't we? Evans' lungs, my hexing skills, and your right hook, Mary- we're pretty formidable, I reckon. See you!"

* * *

.

As soon as they were out of the hospital wing, Vance turned to face her. "You know too, don't you? About Lupin?" She said abruptly.

"Well, Severus had his suspicions," Lily admitted, not feeling particularly charitable towards the Irish girl. "But if you and Rita Skeeter think-"

"If you paid attention to the world sometimes, Evans," Vance broke in coolly. "You'd know we haven't spoken in two years. And besides, she's not going to say anything about Lupin, I made sure of that."

Lily must have looked guilty at her mistake, because Vance softened. "Oh don't get all apologetic, I suppose I deserved that. But right now there are bigger problems. I tried spreading that stuff about Mulciber, like you said, but nobody cares while Black's the centre of attention. Did you manage to speak to Snape?"

Lily shook her head, her lips pursed. Vance lowered her voice, and leaned in conspiratorially. "You know what happened with him and Black and Potter though, right?"

"I'm starting to work it out." She replied, curtly. It wasn't difficult to deduce what Black must have done, and why Severus had been seen arguing with Potter. And she had a niggling feeling in the back of her mind that there was something more that she wasn't picking up on…

For the next few minutes, neither said a word. Slowly, they wandered back towards Gryffindor Tower, and tried not to stare when they passed Sirius Black, who seemed to be engaged in the act of shaking off a hopeful looking Dinah Hopkirk and Paul Sloper. Had it been Pettigrew or Lupin thus ostracised, the more socially concerned of Hogwarts' student body would have had no qualms about ignoring them, but a rift between the equally popular Potter and Black had, to use a favourite expression of Lily's father's, 'bowled them a googly'. Nobody was quite sure how to treat Black, though some had decided that this was the perfect opportunity to become his new best friends, regardless of the possibility of incurring Potter's wrath. Lily saw Vance roll her eyes at the sight and, for once, she quite agreed.

Eventually, as they reached the portrait hole, the dark-haired girl spoke up. "Look, I know you don't like me much Evans, and with good reason, but as much as she wants to think she's coping with it, Mary's going to need a hand."

"Well of course I'll help," Lily said indignantly. "I care too! But if you make one crack about me fancying Potter…"

"Alright, I get it. The subject will never be mentioned again, I swear." Vance paused. "But just one thing, why do you hate him so much?"

Lily hesitated. She hadn't had to think of a reason for her dislike of Potter in a long time- it was just something that was, and she avoided him whenever possible.

"I don't hate him…" She began slowly. "But I do find him very annoying when he keeps trying to ask me out- that's just really stupid and immature. Otherwise, well, it's because he's got everything going for him. He's clever, he's funny, he's got money, his parents love him and so do his friends, but he wastes it by picking on people who don't deserve it."

"Like Snape?" Vance said slyly and then backtracked, noticing her scowl. "Alright, sorry. But you don't give Black half as much grief."

"Black doesn't stare. Also, to be honest I'm not really sure that Black even knows there's a line, but Potter does and he could stop Black crossing it if he really wanted to, and that's even more annoying. But maybe now they've learnt their lesson, Black looked like he had a real cob on back there…" Lily realised that she had been led into saying more than she had wanted to on the subject and clammed up, reddening. "That's enough of that. We never discuss this again or I will personally eviscerate you- got it?"

"Got it," Vance gave her a cheery thumbs up, but there was a small glint in her eyes that made Lily slightly uneasy. "Pax?"

Lily surveyed the hand the other girl stuck out and hesitated for a moment. Eventually, she took the plunge. "Pax."

* * *

.

Severus, thankfully, turned up for Potions on Thursday as usual, which saved Lily from having to blow up the door t the Slytherin Common Room. Somehow, though, he managed to dodge having to speak to her until after the lesson ended, when Lily, despite, having a class in the other direction, pelted after him. "We need to have a talk, Sev."

Her friend seemed distracted again and answered vaguely. "Yeah?"

Lily folded her arms and stared at him until he realised that she wasn't saying anything and turned to face her curiously. "Good, now I've got your attention, where on _earth_ have you been?"

"Oh," She had never seen Severus look so uncomfortable. "Studying. Evan Rosier's been helping with some of those new spells for Defence Against the Dark Arts-"

"Oh I bet he has! So you're friends with Rosier too now? Mulciber and Avery not cool enough for you?"

A hundred strange emotions passed over Severus' face as he stared at her, lost for words. Eventually he seemed to settle on a surly expression and said through gritted teeth. "I thought we were supposed to be friends? Best friends?"

Lily clicked her tongue exasperatedly, deciding to cut to the chase. "We _are_, Sev, but I don't like some of the people you're hanging around with! I'm sorry, but I detest Avery and Mulciber! _Mulciber!_ What do you see in him, Sev? He's creepy! D'you know what he tried to do to Mary Macdonald the other day?"

Her friend shifted his shoulders self-consciously and avoided her eyes. "That was nothing. It was a laugh, that's all-"

"It was Dark Magic, and if you think that's funny-" Lily began hotly but Severus cut her off, suddenly hostile.

"What about the stuff Potter and his mates get up to?"

"What's Potter got to do with anything?"

"They sneak out at night. There's something weird about that Lupin. Where does he keep going?"

This was not the conversation Lily had wanted to have in the slightest. "He's ill," She began weakly. "They say he's ill-"

"Every month at the full moon?"

He was staring at her very hard now, and, though she couldn't quite explain why, Lily suddenly felt very flustered. Red-faced and determined not to be drawn into the subject, she snapped. "I know your theory. Why are you so obsessed with them, anyway? Why do you care what they're doing at night?"

'I'm just trying to show you they're not as wonderful as everyone seems to think they are.'

Lily fidgeted, knowing that her cheeks were burning. She hated herself for what she was about to say, but it was the truth and he needed to hear it. "They don't use Dark Magic, though. And you're being really ungrateful. I heard what happened the other night. You went sneaking down that tunnel by the Whomping Willow and James Potter saved you from whatever's down there-'"

The fury in her friend's eyes was enough evidence that she had hit a nerve. "Saved? Saved? You think he was playing the hero? He was saving his neck and his friends' too! You're not going to- I won't let you-"

"_Let _me? _Let_ me?" Lily could be angry too.

'I didn't mean- I just don't want to see you made a fool of- he fancies you, James Potter fancies you!'

_Wow, well I never noticed that, _a voice in Lily's head said sarcastically. _I must have missed all the awful chat-up lines and the way the idiot's been strutting around like a peacock these past two years. Clearly, I'm just falling at his feet, lovestruck girl that I am._

And yet, she could feel pieces of her heart tearing away in strips as her friend continued to rant. In a way she understood his frustration, might have felt it herself if it were the other way around. She could feel her resolve ebbing away as Severus continued, rage and sadness and bitterness all pouring from him in disjointed phrases.

"And he's not… Everyone thinks… Big Quidditch hero-"

Her last piece of resolve snapped and she broke in desperately. "I know James Potter's an arrogant toerag, I don't need you to tell me that! But Mulciber and Avery's idea of humour is just evil. _Evil_, Sev. I don't understand how you can be friends with them."

She gazed keenly at her friend, hoping that she'd somehow gotten through to him. And sure enough, Severus was looking happier, nodding along with her. But had he really listened? Perhaps she should repeat her warnings anyway.

But Severus was smiling slightly, and seemed a lot more talkative now. "So, what do you think of that Draught of Peace essay Slughorn set? I can't see what he's on about with the excess of Hellebore- surely a bit of powedered moonstone would be a far more efficient catalyst…"

It was too late, the moment was gone. Lily twisted her hands and stammered. "Yeah…listen, I really need to get to Ancient Runes. Talk later?"

Severus nodded, looking slightly crestfallen, but Lily barely noticed as she stalked off, cursing inwardly. How could she have been so weak? She should have been firmer, more demanding. She didn't think he'd even really listened to her about Mulciber and Avery! She was useless, a terrible friend and too soft to boot. And she'd been hypocritical enough to complain about Potter's leniency towards his friends! Well, at least Black might have had a reason-

She stopped dead in the corridor, her eyes wide. Her fingers fumbled with the strap of her satchel and she dug a hand into the clutter of her bag, drawing out the now tattered copy of the day before's 'Prophet. Could it be?

Maybe the day wouldn't be such a loss after all, she thought, as, rather than heading towards Ancient Runes, she found herself turning and rushing in the direction of the library. Maybe there was still one friendship she could keep from being ruined, even if it were against her better judgement.

And though, as she darted amongst the bookshelves for the rest of the afternoon, she did not quite realise it, March 1976 was also destined to bring a new set of friends. Friends who, only a brief three months later, as she sobbed into her pillow, neither judged nor blamed, but simply understood and were there for her, regardless of personal feelings.

* * *

_**.**_

_**Well, that was a bit of a mammoth chapter and I apologise for the length, I really do. I tried to keep it short but somehow it just kept winding on and this was the best I could do for now. Hopefully at some point I'll come back and make amendments that will help to make it snappier- and if you have any ideas please let me know! There was just an awful lot of change to cover here and it seems like this story has changed drastically from when I started it.**_

_**Otherwise, I hope you enjoyed it- I felt it was time Lily got a fight of her own. Obviously the conversation at the end of the chapter largely comes from the memory in 'Harry Potter and the Deathly Hallows', but I thought I needed to work it in somehow. **_

_**Please feel free to review. And thank you so much to the Guest Reviewer who was so kind about the last two chapters, you never fail to make my day :)**_

_**Title of chapter from Queen's 1984 song of the same name (I know, it's out of Lily's time period, but it seemed to work somehow).**_


	5. Teenage Kicks

**_Teenage Kicks: Summer to Autumn, 1976_**

_James Potter,_

_You might not be quite sure why we're writing to you, but you probably remember what happened by the lake last week. (in case it slipped your mind, you dangled Snape upside down again and then tried to ask Lily out- rack your brains, it shouldn't take long). So we'll cut straight to the chase. _

_You, Potter, are an insensitive arse- the most insensitive arsehole in the history of insensitive arseholes (and Mary says that's quite an achievement). We were all rooting for you (alright, I was, Mary says she wasn't) and then you had to go and do THAT. Now as far as we're concerned, you can hex as many Slytherins as you like, but what you do NOT get to do is make our friend cry. Yes, Potter, she cried. Quite a lot, actually. We thought we might need lifeboats. And you know, she hasn't cried in a long time._

_The point is that, thick though you may often appear to be, you had enough intelligence to know that what Snape called Lily meant the end of their friendship. I can assure you, however angry you might have felt, she felt a lot angrier and told us so. Quite strongly. I wouldn't like to be Snape right now. But YOU were barely worth a mention. Asking her out in return for not attacking her friend? That's low, Potter. Who even does that? The villain in a Marjory Monthermer novel? See, Snape's a git, but by doing that, you became a worm._

_We thought you'd improved a bit in the last couple of months (__and who knows, maybe Lily did too, not that it's anything to you now __-Mary said I had to get rid of this part but I stand by it, if you can still read it). But with your stupid little stunt by the lake, we can see that's obviously not the case. Mary was this close to pulling your puny brains out through your nostrils (apparently that's something muggles in Egypt used to do to their dead, but you were meant to be alive when she did it) and I won't lie, you were going to be hexed to kingdom come if I had my way, but it was Lily who stopped us. Because she's a good person (and also, she doesn't even think you're worth it- we're not sorry, James). And, even though you've been claiming to be in love with her for the last two years, you clearly don't appreciate her enough to treat her like a human being and not a prize._

_You have a choice Potter, you can either buck up your ideas or you can stay away from Lily. Because if you EVER make her cry again (__except tears of joy__), ours will be the last faces you see. Oh, and just so you know, Lupin agrees with us (he didn't want to be named, but quite frankly if he agrees so much then he can damn well pick a side)._

_Yours sincerely,_

_A (horrified) Mary MacDonald and (thoroughly disgusted) Emmeline Vance. _

_P.S. Don't bother writing back. I'll just burn it. Tell Black he's a prick from us (you're worse though, arse)._

James scrunched up the parchment and lobbed it at the wall for what must have been the hundredth time. Then he picked it up again, smoothed it out, and spellotaped it back onto the mirror, which blew a raspberry at him and began to quote sections of the letter with much glee.

"Oh shut up," James grumbled, as he threw himself back onto his bed and glared at the ceiling. "And that goes for you too." He added as a Great Grey Owl hooted reproachfully at him from the corner. "If you don't like it here you can go downstairs and Mum can cook _you_ for dinner."

The owl (whose name was Iris) had no intention of going anywhere. Not only was she perfectly aware that, after having broken the kitchen window and made off with a chicken drumstick, Dorea Potter was after her guts, but she was also quite comfortable in the room that James' father habitually referred to as 'The Troll's Lair'. This was because, as its nickname suggested, her sixteen year old owner's bedroom was a haven for any creature that appreciated the beauty of a good mess (and Iris certainly fit into that category). Sweet wrappers and dung bombs and even a dried up nectarine could be found stuffed down the back of most of the furniture, stacks of old comics lined the walls, a small mound of yellowed newspapers covered the end of the bed, and on the wall opposite the window, a strange patch of dirty green mould had taken hold, which, despite the best efforts of James' parents to get rid of it, continued to cling on tenaciously. To put it frankly, the room was a complete tip.

A bit like his social life, James observed wryly, and then smacked his forehead with a groan. That was _exactly_ the kind of selfish melodrama he was supposed to be working on getting rid of. And he hadn't needed Vance and MacDonald to threaten him to realise it. After all the fuss at the lake (and his temper) had died down a bit, he'd been unusually subdued for the rest of the day and had barely spoken on the train ride home, something that Sirius, for one, had taken a lot better than he'd have normally expected. But then, a lot had changed over the last few months.

A sharp knock on the door shattered his melancholy and his mother's voice called out. "Jamie darling, are you up yet?"

James quickly flung out his limbs in an awkward fashion and shut his eyes, giving his best fake snore. This had worked perfectly the previous three times that his parents had come looking for him in the past hour. He didn't feel up to talking to them at the moment, or tidying his room.

But, rather than bursting in to check that her baby was still alive, his mother simply sighed. "Alright, well don't say I didn't warn you."

There was a pause and then a soft click from the direction of the door. James lay very still and focused. It was all in the breathing.

And then something- a quite vicious something- prodded him in the side. James forced himself not to move; it was probably his father, trying to catch him out. Well, he wouldn't give in that easily.

Then, suddenly, one of his socks was whipped off and, by the sounds of things, Iris was enjoying her new toy very much. _Don't rise to it, just wait, they'll give up soon. _

But they didn't. Over the next five minutes James was in turn prodded, tickled, sat on, and even splashed with water. By now he was aware that his parents must know he was pretending, but it had become a matter of pride. James Potter's fake sleeping act had never been beaten, not even by his father (who claimed to be able to read the Daily Prophet with his eyes closed- not that he was missing anything). He wasn't going to relinquish that position without a fight.

Then suddenly the assault ceased. Was that all they had? Honestly, James was a little disappointed in them. He had expected more from the people who had managed to raise the greatest mastermind of mischief that Hogwarts had ever seen (if he did say so himself).

The klaxon which roared into life a moment later proved otherwise. James sat bolt upright, yelping. "No! Don't touch her- I'm getting up, I'm getting-"

"Seriously mate, you've started calling it 'her' now?" The dark-haired boy at the end of his bed laughed, as he replaced James' Comet 260 broomstick on its stand and the blaring of the alarm ceased again.

James adjusted his glasses and blinked. "P-Padfoot?" His eyes slid to the doorway, where his parents were both stood, shaking with silent laughter. "Wha-what's going on?" He turned back to Sirius and pointed at him accusingly. "How long have you been here?!"

Sirius looked slightly abashed and glanced at James' mother, who slowly regained control of herself and wheezed. "He's been downstairs at least an hour, if you hadn't been too busy moping to notice."

"I wasn't moping…" James scowled around the room as his parents dissolved into another fit of giggles. "You should be ashamed of yourselves, both of you. Corrupting Sirius- he's an innocent!" He said, doing his best impersonation of Remus Lupin's prefect voice. The gale of laughter which greeted this little performance put him back on even footing and he swung himself off the bed to embrace his friend. "How are you mate? You never answered my owl- I didn't know you were coming over."

"Yeah well, neither did I to tell the truth." James noticed as he drew away from Sirius again that his friend had changed considerably in the month since they had last seen each other, and not just in that he now outstripped James by nearly a foot rather than a couple of inches. Dark shadows had formed under his eyes, his once artfully scruffy look was now simply scruffy, his hair needed cut, and his muggle clothes were ripped and stained with mud and grass and- was that blood? The burst lip and black eye had rather spoilt the aristocratic good looks that Sirius had been so fond of exploiting as well.

James' staring seemed to embarrass Sirius again and once more he looked towards the door. Charlus and Dorea Potter exchanged a look and then his father spoke up. "Sirius is going to be staying here from now on."

"Just for a while," His friend broke in hastily. "I don't want to be a bother-"

"Don't be ridiculous," Dorea said firmly. "You're like James, you choose the silliest things to be embarrassed about. You can stay for as long as you like. In fact," Here she sent her husband a meaningful look. "We'll go and see about getting your room made up now."

"Really it's not-"

"Believe me, you don't want to end up sharing a room with this one," James' father cut him off, jerking a thumb at his son. "It's like living with a troll."

"Oi, it's for Iris- she likes it up here…" James argued weakly, but his father simply grinned. "Does she? Come here pet."

The owl in question fluttered happily over to nibble at the treat that Charlus Potter held out and gazed up at him adoringly, her owner completely forgotten.

"Traitor." James muttered, but his parents only laughed again as they backed out of the room and closed the door behind them. He picked up a waste paper basket and began to sweep the worst of the rubbish into it as Sirius leant awkwardly against the window sill, glancing around the room with a distracted expression. For a while neither of them said much, and James eventually decided that it would be a lot easier to tidy if he just shoved all of the junk into his cupboard. This backfired, however, when he opened the cupboard door and a dungbomb narrowly missed his head, splatting against the wall next to Sirius, much to his friend's astonishment.

"Mum," James explained with a resigned sigh, catching the piece of notepaper that floated after the dungbomb. "She's probably charmed it to do that if I don't put the right stuff in there. Yep, says so here."

He flung the note into the bin and turned to sit on the bed, fixing his friend with a probing expression, now unable to restrain his curiosity. "So what happened? Do you want to talk about it?"

Sirius shrugged, folding his arms defensively. "D'you really want to know that much?"

James hesitated. Then he shook his head. "You only have to tell me if you want to. I don't need to know."

An expression of surprise and then relief flitted across Sirius' face, before disappearing again as he assumed a blank expression. "Thanks, mate." He muttered, almost inaudibly and James nodded back in silent understanding.

After a moment, Sirius cleared his throat, rolled his shoulders back, and began to stroll around the room, stepping neatly over an old Lunascope and scrutinising the letter tacked onto the mirror. "So what've you been up to? Is this from _Vance_?"

"And Mary MacDonald," Unlike Sirius, James was perfectly happy to vent about his problems. "We- _I_\- went too far last time."

"What- Prongs, that wasn't your fault. Snape's been calling every other muggleborn _that_ for years." He paused and then squinted through the ink-stains at Emmeline Vance's untidy scrawl. "Mind you, they do have a point about the Monthermer villain thing-"

"Yeah well, do you think I don't know that?" James kicked out moodily at the waste paper basket. "I just can't _talk _to her."

"Confidence issues? You? You ask her out all the time. I'd say that counts as talking. In fact, that takes guts."

"That's the problem!" James took a deep breath. "Every time she's around I can't speak and then once I asked her out and it felt a lot better than standing there like a dead haddock and now I can't stop! Padfoot, you have to promise me, if I try to ask her out again- stop me. Even if you have to knock me out, just stop me."

Sirius pulled a face. "But it's bloody hilarious!" He pretended to pout and then sighed. "Alright fine, but only if you promise to shut up about her bloody hair. I get it, it's ginger-"

"It's red," James corrected and then swore mentally. "But fine, that's a deal. In fact, from now on I am _not_ in love with Lily. I'm going to get this all out of my system. You'll see."

"Well you can start by taking this letter down. Why'd you pin it up anyway? Bit masochist."

"Maso- whatever. Leave it up. I'm going to be _mature_ this year, Padfoot."

Sirius looked confused. "What, for Evans? You just said-"

"No not for Lily- _Evans_," He corrected himself sternly. "But there's got to be a line. I crossed it last year. I don't fancy doing it again."

Sirius gave a bark of laughter. "You're not fooling anyone, you know."

"I'm serious!"

"No you're not. _I_ am. And that's beside the point," Sirius wagged a finger at him disapprovingly. "You go on like this, you'll end up Head Boy!"

"I will not. There's a difference between having a laugh and being a git though." James stood up and shoved his hands in his pocket, no longer eager to continue the discussion. "Let's get out of here. That dungbomb stinks."

But Sirius didn't give up so easily and shook his head incredulously. "So that's what you've been sulking about then!"

"I have _not_ been sulking."

"Your mum says you have."

"My mum's insane."

"I heard that!" Came an indignant voice from the floor above and James gave his bedroom door a shove in order to poke his head out and shout back. "You don't deny it though!"

Stepping out into the corridor, he held the door open as Sirius bounded after him. "Come on, I'll show you round."

"Sure you wouldn't rather be showing Evans round?"

"One more word and you're out."

* * *

The summer of 1976 would forever be remembered by muggles in Britain as the hottest on record, and this was no different in the wizarding world. Even before school had broken up, the Giant Squid had needed hosing down twice a day by Professor Kettleburn's N.E.W.T. students and, as the long summer days had only become more scorching since, Dorea Potter's dirigible plums apparently required even more careful attention. This, typically, meant that James had been forcibly enlisted as their nanny for the foreseeable future and, along with Sirius (who had been uncharacteristically quick in his offer to help), he spent most of his afternoons standing in the garden with a heavy watering can coaxing the wilted plants back to life, and dreaming up bad puns.

"Hey Prongs, I've got one. "How to Spot Plants in Your Garden", by Teresa Green."

"That's ancient Padfoot. You lose."

"Bugger. Thought you wouldn't notice."

"Don't you use such flowery language with me, you clueless townie!"

"Pansy!"

Meanwhile, Dorea herself had escaped at the earliest opportunity and was to be found down at Godric's Hollow parish church, "paying her respects" and having long, befuddling conversations with the thoroughly bamboozled vicar about theology. The good man might have found his venerable parishioner's habit of wearing gold robes and a tall green hat a little eccentric at first, but he had been quick to spot her obvious wealth and was duly accommodating of her interest in the church. James often wondered if he would have been quite so full of praise had he known that it was Dorea who had placed whoopee cushions in the choir stalls the previous Easter, producing an angelic chorus of fart noises just as the service was about to begin. Still, he wasn't likely to work it out any time soon; this _was_ the man who had described James and Sirius, upon passing their efforts in the garden, as 'diligent children of God' (he clearly hadn't noticed Sirius swapping the bible in his pocket for a personally annotated copy of 'Scales and Serpents').

James' father, on the other hand, had little opportunity to indulge in hi-jinks. The weather was not the only thing becoming heated, and, in his role as editor and sole proprietor of the outspoken broadsheet 'The Morning Chronicle", Charlus was currently under siege from owls carrying news of the political feeling from all over the country. The Minister for Magic might have officially declared the ongoing hostilities a war, but the Daily Prophet was still ambiguous at best in its support for the government and so the more frustrated journalists turned to the Chronicle for a platform on which to air their views. Charlus had only narrowly escaped being sued for libel thirty-nine times over the past six months, and so his was a difficult task, attempting to ensure that his readers were told the truth as much as possible, without running the risk of the publication being shut down.

Nevertheless, amidst all this work, he had still found the time to smooth over the matter of Sirius' absconding from the Black household with the Ministry. While this meant that any possible breach of the Decree for the Reasonable Restriction of Underage Sorcery prior to Sirius' arrival in Godric's Hollow had been waived, and that Hogwarts was now aware of his new residence, it also meant that, despite all of James' parents' precautions, word of their son's location inevitably filtered through to Walburga and Orion Black. And one particularly sweltering Sunday, as the boys engaged in their fifty-third plant fight, the arrival of a haughty looking owl bearing a scarlet, smoking envelope rather spoilt their fun.

"Howler." Sirius said tersely, grabbing at the envelope and rushing away inside.

Making sure that nobody was lurking on the street who might hear, James followed, trampling the begonias harshly in his anxiety. They had not touched on the subject of Sirius' altercation with his parents since his arrival, and his friend's unusual reluctance to talk was enough to tell James that it was a serious matter. But he had a feeling that after the Howler had done its work, there might have to be some explanations and, whilst he respected his friend's privacy, he was guiltily conscious of the curiosity that stabbed at his brain.

Sirius had only just managed to make it to his bedroom when the Howler went off, scooting around the room in a furious fizzle of sparks and smoke as a screeching voice bounced off the walls. The person on the other end seemed incoherent with rage and the boys could only make out the occasional stream of abuse as the letter spat and flared.

"Scumsucker! Associating with filthy mudbloods and half-breeds and mongrels…disgusting posters…no son of mine…skaitbird, wastrel, cowardly beggar…BLOOD-TRAITOR- DUNGLICKER- GALLOWS-FOOD- MISBEGOTTEN MANDRAKE- MUD-WALLOWING THIEVING- FILTHY DEGENERATE-"

Here the voice became so frenzied that James half-hoped its owner might explode but the screeching was cut off as a colder, male voice echoed eerily around the room.

"Your mother is distraught- we will not stand for this sort of behaviour! We will remove those _disgusting_ pictures from your walls and your name will be forgotten from this household. You are no longer our son. Tell my halfwit cousin she can keep you for all we care. If you ever attempt to make contact with this family again, you will regret it. Do not return to this house. You are nothing now but a disgrace, a stain. We did our best but now we wash our hands of you. You have brought this on yourself, boy. Do not ever presume to call us your parents again."

And, with an officious rustle, the letter folded itself up and disintegrated into a small pile of ash on the floor.

Sirius swayed slightly and steadied himself on the desk in the corner. Suddenly he let out a harsh bark of laughter. "Well the old bugger can go-"

Here he made a rude hand gesture and sunk back into silence. James, who had been standing in the doorway, adjusted his glasses and peered at his friend thoughtfully. "What disgusting pictures?" He eventually asked.

Sirius dug a hand under his bed and produced a battered newspaper, which he tossed in his friend's direction. "Page three." He said, with something of his old smirk, as James caught the rag easily and flicked through.

After a moment, James folded up the newspaper again with a cough. "Well I'm afraid I'm going to have to confiscate this for- er- for your own good," Sirius gave a knowing snort and James adjusted his glasses again self-consciously. "Seriously though, you had these things on your walls?"

"Well, it pissed my mum off. I think dear old father was a bit more concerned about all the Gryffindor stuff though, seeing as he's got a box under his bed with a bunch of old back-numbers of 'Busty Banshees'-"

"Eugh, 'Busty Banshees'? That's disgusting."

"Yeah, me and Reg put them in Lucius Malfoy's room once when they were round to stay before-" Sirius fell silent again, suddenly looking stricken. It was the first time he'd actively mentioned his brother in front of James for what must have been at least three or four years. Usually, he just pretended not to have one.

James sat down on the bed and scanned the room, which was unnaturally clean and tidy, especially considering his best friend's attitude to the Hogwarts dormitories. The only sign that a teenage boy lived there at all was the Hogwarts trunk in the corner, from which poked the sleeve of a pair of shocking yellow dress robes, and the unfortunate Wailing Banshees paraphernalia scattered around. Downstairs a clattering noise, muffled swearing, and the screech of a happy owl announced his mother's return from the church.

Eventually, he looked back at Sirius, who was busily sweeping up the Howler ash. "Look you don't have to talk about it, but it might help-?"

Sirius very pointedly avoided his eye as he tipped the ashes into the bin. Eventually, he grunted. "Suppose you ought to know. It was- we had a fight. A big one."

"You and your parents?"

"Yeah. Well, you probably already knew that." Here he jerked his head stiffly in the direction of the remains of the Howler. Then he gave a weak grin as if to show that it didn't affect him. "It was really stupid actually. You know my cousin's getting married to Malfoy?"

James nodded. The Daily Prophet had been in raptures ever since the engagement had been announced, with much wild speculation over the colour of dress robes the blushing bride would be wearing and whether or not the groom's family had really managed to get special permission from the Ministry to have Golden Snidgets fly out of the cake upon being cut. Readers of the Morning Chronicle, on the other hand, were rather more interested in how many alleged Death Eaters were attending, and Charlus Potter had been inundated with hysterical letters claiming that the mysterious leader of the extremists would arrive riding a dragon and rain fire on half of Wiltshire. James' parents had not been invited but they were about the only pure-blood family, whether pro- or anti-Death Eater, who hadn't; it was the biggest event of the season and, amidst all the Goblin strikes and shop attacks, the wizarding world had gone mad for it.

"Go on then, is it true Narcissa was seen in the back room of Twilfitt and Tattings? Stocking up for her wedding night was she?" James joked, in a feeble attempt to lighten the atmosphere.

"Really didn't need that image." Sirius gagged, before continuing. "Anyway, so I didn't fancy going and I think dear old Dad was probably pretty happy about that, but my mum- well, she just had to rub it in. Started making all these comments about how I'd only bring shame on them anyway and that kind of rubbish. You know, just being her usual bitchy self and I didn't really care much at first. But then she started bringing Regulus into it- saying he had to work twice as hard to make up for me, and how he was going to bring extra pride to the family. Apparently Bella's been putting in a word for him with that git they're all so fond of- the Snark Lord or whatever- and they were hoping Reg would be joining up soon or some shit-"

"_What_? You're not serious? He's not even sixteen! No way!"

Sirius shrugged. "Yeah, they've been recruiting at Hogwarts too- I thought you knew? Course Reg is still young, even by those standards. And after she said that I kind of- er, well maybe I pushed her too far..." He shoved his hands in his pockets, looking increasingly uncomfortable as he circled the point. "She went mental. Like- you heard her just now-"

"That was your mum?!" _Merlin, no wonder his dad goes in for banshees._

"Yeah, well believe me that was pretty tame in comparison to what she was like when-" His friend was looking mildly distressed now, as if he was trying to find the words to express what had happened but without giving too much away. "Anyway, then my dad joined in and er-" Here, his hand twitched in the direction of the yellowing bruise around his left eye but he swiftly forced it back into his pocket.

Seeing that extracting every last detail of what had occurred between Sirius and his parents was clearly going to be a painful process, James decided to save him from explaining any further. "So you left?" He prompted, digging in his pocket for the crumbling remains of a battered bar of Honeydukes that he had stolen from Remus before term broke up.

Sirius caught the chocolate and plonked himself down on the end of the bed next to him. "Yeah- well, I reckon they realised about two minutes after I walked out that it wouldn't look good to have their son running out on them, but the Ministry don't know about Padfoot so I lay low for a bit, then got the muggle train down here. The disillusionment charm was pretty hard work though, what with my wand. Set my hair on fire once-"

"Your wand?" James interjected sharply. "What's up with your wand?"

Sirius looked furious with himself. After a moment, though, he crossed over to his trunk and rummaged beneath the yellow robes. Turning back to face James, he dropped the remains of a wand into his hand, heavily spellotaped, but not enough to hold together the two broken halves of wood.

"To add insult to injury. Family heirloom though, so no big loss." Sirius quipped, grinning weakly again. James did not smile, and instead laid the wand down carefully on the duvet and stood up. "You should have said. Mum can take us to Ollivander's tomorrow- get you a new one-"

"No." His friend shook his head angrily. "No, it'll be fine until next year-"

"Padfoot," James was uncharacteristically firm for once, and his stern voice would have done Remus Lupin proud. "You need a new wand. That thing's dangerous."

"Yeah well, I'll get a job and pay for my own then-"

"My mum won't let you."

"So don't tell her."

"Tough luck. You're getting a wand, no arguments. And you know you can stay here for as long as you like, right?"

Sirius only mumbled in reply, something about not wanting to be a bother. James grabbed a pair of socks out of the trunk and lobbed them at his friend's head.

"Oi, none of that! You're family now." He reached for the door handle, then paused on the threshold as he remembered the muggle newspaper and discretely stowed it in his back pocket. "Just don't be sticking any of those pictures up in here-"

Sirius looked horrified. "You honestly think I'd let your parents see them?"

James grinned as he made to shut the door. "You want to watch out. My mum's not stupid. Insane, but not stupid."

"You better give me that paper back then- wouldn't want her to catch you with it."

"Nice try. I'm, er, more responsible. And subtle. And you're getting a wand. Goodbye."

"No, wait-"

"Bye-eee!"

* * *

Though she had predicted being ambushed by a hungry Great Grey Owl on her return from the church, Dorea Potter had not, however, been expecting her son to barrel into her with equal force twenty minutes later. Catching her breath, she ruffled James' hair in a mixture of pleasant surprise and utter bemusement at this strange and sudden display of affection. "Well hello. What's this in aid of?"

"Nothing. Just- you're the best mum, you know that?"

"Have you had many?"

"No I- sorry for sulking. You're awesome. Love you."

"That's very nice, thank you. I love you too." Dorea patted his head fondly as he released her from the strangling embrace. "Does this mean you'll tidy your room then?"

"Er, could I get back to you on that one?"

* * *

Though the summer had been a scorcher, autumn arrived with a vengeance. As the weather broke, all marks of the drought were swiftly discarded: hippogriffs with heatstroke no longer had to be fished out of the ocean after their attempts at cooling down went awry, Florean Fortescue was able to return to his beloved books now that the ice cream sales in Diagon Alley had substantially dropped off, and in, the corridors of the Ministry of Magic, poor Dedalus Diggle, who had been so eager for promotion, found himself out of a job as Head of the United Herbologists' 'Stop the Heat' Coalition only two days after being instated. The skies over Hogwarts regained their usual gloomy aspect as September wore on, cold winds swept through the corridors and slammed branches into the windows, and absolutely everything, from owls and clothes to quills and homework, seemed to be ninety per cent water, courtesy of the permanent drizzle.

Though both his father and Remus claimed that he was over-exaggerating, James maintained that he had forgotten what the sun looked like. Sirius, of course, unnatural creature that he was, was in his element, ploughing delightedly through muddy puddles in both his human and animagus form and coating all those unfortunate enough to be standing close to him with a thick layer of slime and grit. But James was not quite so impressed with the weather, especially since every morning he had to make the torturous choice between the warmth of his duvet and several hours freezing on top of his broomstick, doing his best to whip six shivering second and third years into shape (honestly, it was enough to make him wonder if anybody cared about Quidditch anymore- but no, it was all N.E.W.T.s and Preliminaries for his fellow older students these days, the slackers). Which was why, when one particularly wet Sunday morning's training had been broken up by Professor McGonagall explaining that the Headmaster wished to see him, he had gone gladly, without a hint of worry.

Several hours later, sitting hunched in the most secluded corner of the library and clutching feebly at a bucket of his own vomit, James was left wondering how it was possible that everything could have gone so wrong so suddenly. From the other side of the shelves, he could hear the low whispers and barely suppressed giggles of his fellow students as they compared spell diagrams and moon-charts and battered copies of Witch Weekly, entirely oblivious to the storm outside the walls. Only the previous evening, he had been the same, going about his normal everyday business without a hint of anxiety: losing at Exploding Snap to a gang of smug fifth years, procrastinating shamelessly over a particularly brutal Potions essay, ruthlessly sacrificing Remus to yet another of Sirius' demands to go out for a walk in the rain, openly dreaming of the Quidditch Cup and (rather more privately) trying to stifle an equally strong urge to drift off into happy thoughts of green eyes beneath an ivory lace veil. And yet all those memories seemed so long ago now, almost as if they were part of another life.

Poison in the communion wine, Dumbledore had said. James might have laughed if he wasn't already on the verge of tears. It was a suitably dramatic way to go: who knew, maybe Dorea Potter was busy teasing the local vicar about it up in heaven. It was almost unbelievable- another of his mother's practical jokes. And he wouldn't have believed it, had he not seen with his own eyes the tear-stained and almost illegible letter his father had sent to Hogwarts. But even the combined presence of Professors Dumbledore and McGonagall had not been able to keep James in the Headmaster's office once the message had started to sink in, and they hadn't tried very hard anyway. He wondered if they had told Sirius yet.

_Shit, Sirius._ The last time his friend had been left alone to stew in his own grief and anger, he'd nearly killed Snape. James tried struggling to his feet but was thwarted as his stomach gave another agonising twist and he retched, spitting bile into the bucket. He covered his face with his hands with a frustrated groan. _Move you useless git. Stop wallowing in self-pity. _

"Do you need a hand?" A quiet voice broke through his thoughts and James' head snapped up with a crack that made him wince. Lily Evans was standing at the end of the row of shelves, her arms full of books, having clearly just rounded the corner with the intention of replacing them. She was biting her lip, a tinge of beetroot red creeping over her face and, shaking her head, began to turn away. "You probably want to be alone, I'll just- oh damn." Several of the books had tumbled out of her arms and she scrabbled for her wand, though this meant the loss of the remaining tomes as well.

Given the circumstances of their previous encounter (without another Marauder around to save him from his urge to ask her out on the train back to school, he had settled for making an extremely high-pitched squealing noise and rocking back and forwards until the Gryffindor girls left) James would normally have been readying himself to flee at this point. However, for some reason, his usual Evans-induced panic mode seemed to be malfunctioning and, with a surprisingly sane aspect, he answered dully. "No, it's fine. I was just going anyway."

Once again though, his attempts at moving ended in a fresh bout of retching. Aware that Lily was not so subtly sneaking alarmed glances in his direction as she pointed her wand at the books, he quickly vanished the contents of the bucket and fidgeted with his glasses in embarrassment. Suddenly, she blurted. "You really don't look like you should be going anywhere."

"I'm fine, I just need to- ah, shit," Having stood up too quickly, a wave of dizziness had momentarily engulfed his brain and he steadied himself on the shelves. "I need to- where's that bucket-"

A hand shoved the pail underneath his nose and he snatched at it gratefully. Despite the painful somersaults his stomach seemed to be doing, however, he did not retch again and made to move away. Lily, on the other hand, placed herself firmly in his way. "You sit tight," She ordered, in a very Madam Pomfrey-esque voice. "You're in shock. What is it that you need? Do you want me to get someone else?"

"No I- Sirius, I need to see if he's ok-"

"Peter's looking after him and Emmeline went to get Remus out of Remedial Potions. He's in good hands- they'll look after him."

"I can't just mope here-"

"Mope?" Lily looked at him incredulously. "You've every right to mope. Listen, you can't bottle things like this up, Potter. Believe me that just ends badly for everyone and it'll only make you miserable. Let it all out." There was a glint in her eye that brooked no opposition and James found himself nodding meekly and sinking back onto the floor. Satisfied, Lily folded her arms. "Would you like me to tell Black you're down here? I mean, he wasn't throwing up but I know he was close to- to…" She trailed off, looking awkward.

James shook his head. Knowing that Sirius was being looked after was one thing, but he didn't think he could stand to be around another grieving person at the moment. It was the very reason he had fled so suddenly from Dumbledore's office- he had been told that he could take the floo network straight home if necessary, but hadn't been able to face the idea of dealing with his father straight away. Not until he'd got the damn thing straightened out at least.

Lily was nothing if not persistent. "Well how about Peter then? Isn't there anyone you want to see? You can't just be alone here."

"Why, do you think I'll hurt the library?" The words were out of his mouth before he knew he was even saying them, and he was amazed at his brain's capacity to think up jokes in any situation. It was a gift- or curse- he'd largely acquired from his mother though, and that thought was not a nice one.

Lily was wearing a slightly bemused expression, but obligingly gave a small giggle. "There's a thing. Why here? I don't think I've ever seen you in the library in your life."

"Didn't think anyone would look down here," He frowned and took off his glasses to polish them anxiously, thinking back suddenly to all she'd said about bottling things up and wondering if the half-hearted jokes were a sign that he was going mad. "Er, look, would you mind if I asked you something?"

Lily hesitated for a second but nodded, settling herself on the floor opposite him, green eyes fixed on him expectantly. James fidgeted for a moment, trying to think of the best way to phrase his question.

"Er- you were saying about letting stuff out… I mean, a few years ago… What I'm trying to say is, er, you're the only other person I know who's, er, lost a parent and…" He made a helpless movement with his hands. Even admitting that his mother was 'gone' seemed absurd and uncomfortable.

Luckily, Lily seemed to catch on. "And I knocked out Paul Sloper's teeth. Honestly, don't keep it to yourself. It doesn't end well."

"But everybody's going to-" He gritted his teeth. "How many people know?"

"It was in the Daily Prophet," She said apologetically, as if there had been any way she could have altered the fact. "Primrose Brown's got a subscription, so we found out pretty quickly. But I think… can I anticipate you here for a second?"

"Anticipate away."

"I think- am I right in thinking that you're worried people are going to look at you differently? Or something?" When he gave a jerky nod in answer, she ventured tentatively. "Well, they are. Sorry. But with most of them, it'll only be for a while. And maybe that's what's needed? I don't know, but if it were me, I'd get really angry if, on the other hand, people just went on like nothing had changed. So maybe it's the lesser of the two evils. But that's just my opinion…" She trailed off, eyes flicking around the room absent-mindedly. "Oh, your hair."

James, who had been staring at the carpet as he brooded over her words, jerked out of his thoughts. "Huh?"

"It's all flat. I- sorry, it just usually looks- yeah, better." She sent him an awkward thumbs up as he raised a hand to his head and attempted to revive his hair with a few careful prods.

For a brief moment, silence reigned, as James tried to give voice to what he had really been trying to ask all along. Eventually, he decided that there was no other option but to just come out with it.

"What do I do now? Afterwards?"

"After-? Oh. I don't know…" James' confusion must have been evident because Lily immediately shook her head. "No that's not what I mean, of course I know. But- I think it's quite personal? I needed to remember my mum, and everything she told me and I had to try to live by it. But other people- my sister, I think she wanted to forget… I can't tell you how you should deal with it. But there are some things- like I said, don't bottle it up. Don't feel bad for needing to grieve, it's important. But if you want to laugh at something, don't feel guilty about it- just go with what your instinct tells you. Look after yourself too. I know it's difficult sometimes but make sure you eat, make sure you sleep, things like that. And don't shut people out. Getting stuck in your own head is really miserable. Mind you, sometimes you need to be alone too. I- I'm sorry I can't really think of what else to say." She finished, with a sad smile.

James considered the bottom of the bucket for a while. Though he still wasn't sure whether he wanted to move, talking for a bit _had_ actually helped, at least in that his head felt slightly less dizzy. Lily was picking at the carpet, her face starting to go red again and her jaw clenched stiffly, occasionally glancing in the direction of the books still scattered on the floor behind her.

"Alright," He finally raised his head and gave a trembling grin. "D'you reckon you could let Sirius know I'm down here? If he wants to know."

"Oh, um, yes of course. Just give me a minute." Lily made to sort the books again but James waved a hand. "Nah, I can do that."

"Are you sure? Well, alright. If I can't find Black, should I send Peter?"

"Er yeah, why not. I'll just-"

"Right. Do you need anything else?"

James shook his head. "No. But, er, thanks, Evans. Just- thanks."

The redheaded girl nodded in return as she backed away, looking thoughtful. And then he was alone again.

Eventually, after sharing the silence with Sirius for several more hours and then hauling himself to his feet to make his way to the Headmaster's office, James returned home. For a while the two boys and James' father found some comfort in each other's company but finally, true to Lily's words they all began to feel the need to be alone. Charlus disappeared off to his study with Iris on his shoulder and a stack of articles in hand, Sirius busied himself with taking a cutting from the best dirigible plum bush and planting it in a pot on his window sill, and James, narrowly avoiding a pile of dung bombs in his cupboard, made a start on tidying his room.

* * *

_**More waffling from me, but hopefully everything was clear and juggled half-decently. **_

_**Also, sorry, I have far too much fun writing James' family- they're truly happy, which is more than can be said for many and I really like writing happy people.**_

_**Anyway, please review- that would really help me to cut down on the waffling and actually improve what I'm writing :)**_

_**Title of chapter from the Undertones' 1979 song of the same name.**_


	6. With a Little Help From My Friends

_**.**_

_**With a Little Help From My Friends: March 1977**_

"Where are we going?"

"You'll see."

"Emmeline…"

"It'll be fun, I promise!"

"I don't doubt that, but what if Black starts handing out firewhiskey to the first years again? It could kill them and he doesn't know that-"

"Don't worry, I promised to hex him if he does anything stupid."

"I thought we'd been over this Em? Never assume that Black knows that there's a line- he crosses it far too often without realising."

"You're right, we _did_ discuss it. That's why I also promised to hex Lupin if he _lets_ him do anything stupid."

Lily gave up. To be honest, she was actually quite impressed that her friend had listened to her at all. Clearly, she wasn't great at hiding her surprise though, because Emmeline folded her arms and frowned. "I'm not completely daft, you know."

"I never said that. I think you're very good at hexing people."

"Just not very good at being responsible?" Lily bit her lip and cursed inwardly. She hadn't wanted an argument, not after the nail-biting Quidditch match that had almost given her a heart attack on at least three separate occasions. She wasn't particularly fond of the game, or its players, but even she had let out a small scream when one of the Slytherin chasers had grabbed Hestia Jones' head and smashed it against the goal hoop. After two hours of that kind of behaviour, anyone's nerves would have been shot to pieces, especially if they knew they would also have to deal with the post-match party once Gryffindor finally claimed the victory.

But Emmeline was smiling, a gleam in her eye. "Don't worry Lils, I'm only pulling your leg. But you do need a break. Leave our illustrious Head Boy to deal with it for once- it's his job, after all."

Lily snorted, thinking that the chances of Tiberius McLaggen actually leaving his little den of blankets, N.E.W.T. revision notes and half-empty vodka bottles were very slim. Even Professor Slughorn had been finding it difficult lately to drag him away from the stacks of parchment and if McLaggen wasn't attending "Old Sluggy's little dos" then he certainly wasn't going to pay any attention to the party raging around him, not even if the whole Common Room ended up being set on fire (which had actually been looking increasingly likely when Lily had been dragged out of the portrait hole). Eventually, though, Emmeline's hopeful expression won her over and she sighed, rolling her eyes.

"Alright, then- what's the surprise? And why are we down here- it's boiling."

Emmeline only grinned and reached up behind her head. As Lily ducked out of the way, the other girl stretched out a hand towards a painting of a fruit bowl which hung, seemingly at random, on the wall behind. Then to, Lily's amazement, the pear upon which Emmeline had rested her hand, let out a giggle. "What-"

Her disbelief only increased when the pear turned into a door knob, which Emmeline pulled open and stepped through the door that had appeared, waving for her to follow. Curiously, Lily obliged and found herself-

"Oh my giddy aunt. Is this the _kitchens_?"

The room was _huge_ and positively bustling with floating pots and tea trays and strange utensils of all shapes and sizes. At the far end stood a gigantic fireplace, from inside which bright blue flames roared and spat whilst several house elves turned food on spits. And speaking of food, it was everywhere: golden platters filled with sausages and chicken drumsticks and various cold hams, five different varieties of fish sizzling on the fire that the mere sight of made her stomach rumble, and great wobbling jellies in a hundred different colours. It was just so ridiculous that somewhere so large and busy and simply astonishing could exist, and yet one could go through one's entire school career without even noticing it.

"I love Hogwarts sometimes."

"Told you it would be fun."

"You were right. But how did you know how to get in?"

Emmeline's grin grew wider. "I got Remus to tell me. And Merlin, you should have seen Black's face when I asked to talk to him _alone_…"

"Oh my God, the poor things! You're evil, you really are."

Emmeline had been helping Remus Lupin with his Potions work since the start of the year, but, as a result of various encounters which were not entirely a coincidence, Sirius Black had gained the impression that the two were, to put it mildly, having relations of a more _intimate _kind. And, after witnessing both the sheer horror and disgust on Black's face at the thought of his friend doing _that_ with a _girl_, and Remus' obvious distress upon being tackled about the affair, it had become Emmeline's favourite hobby to find new ways of embarrassing them both about it on a regular basis.

One would have thought, of course, that Sirius Black, with all his bravado and arrogance, would have been rather less easily unsettled by the thought of the dirty deed. Or perhaps it was just indignation that Lupin seemed to be seeing more action than him. In any case, it made the whole situation ten times funnier. Even Lily, though she felt a bit sorry for Remus, always seemed to find herself helpless with laughter every time Emmeline winked at him from across the room, or deliberately leaned across him in Defence Against the Dark Arts when she knew that Black would be peeking through his fingers in terror from the seat behind.

Emmeline scoffed. "It's their own fault, they both know full well I'm not interested in blokes. Just because Black can't come clean about fancying Lupin, doesn't mean the rest of us are going to hide away-"

"Alright, no more, I'll rupture something," Lily clutched at the stitch in her side as she steadied herself against the wall. "You still haven't said why we're here."

Emmeline simply tugged at her arm again. "This way."

In one of the quieter corners of the kitchen, two house elves in neat green tea towels were milling around a pile of plum-coloured cushions. In the middle, Mary MacDonald sat cross-legged, looking very stiff and self-conscious every time she was forced to address one of the house elves. In her lap sat a large ceramic mixing bowl, the contents of which she was prodding suspiciously with her wand. As they drew closer, she looked up in relief. "Ah, you got her. Thank God, it feels like you've been gone for _hours_."

"It's been fifteen minutes, Mary. How's the cake coming along?"

"Cake?" Lily interjected, curiously. "Emmeline, what is this?"

But it was Mary who replied. "Em thought- and I agree- that since it's almost exactly a year since we all became _proper_ friends, and also since we never celebrated your birthday, we should have a wee party to ourselves down here."

"You've been so stressed lately- what with your Dad being ill," Emmeline added. "I was going to invite some others at first- you know, Mariam Shafiq and the Changs and Esther MacMillan- but Mary thought it would be better just the three of us."

"Oh," Lily wasn't quite sure whether to laugh or cry. "Thank you both so much. You're right I-" She broke off, overwhelmed. How on earth was she supposed to express how grateful she was to them both, how amazing it was that, though they'd only been close for a year, they each were prepared to support each other in every way possible? And that they were always honest with her, when she asked them to be?

Luckily, she was saved from having to find words, as something prodded her elbow, and a small voice asked, "Tea, miss?"

She stared at the house elf and stammered. "Er, I- I couldn't possibly bother you-"

"It is no bother, miss." Said the elf, already in the act of filling her a mug. "Milk? Sugar?"

"Just milk please, but- oh." Having added the milk, the elf pushed the tea into her hands with a smile and disapparated. Lily turned to her friends helplessly. "Em, we can't- surely they're really busy…"

"Tch, what is it with you muggleborns and house elves? Mary's the same," Here she indicated the mixing bowl in the girl's hands. "Thought she had to make the cake herself. They're quite happy to help."

"Still…" Lily tried not to feel guilty as she sank down onto the cushions. "Anyway, what are we going to do?"

"Well there are the obvious things," Emmeline said happily as she flopped down next to her. "Mary brought games- Basilisks and Broomsticks, Exploding Snap. And we have loads of food. You know those new sweets that change your voice? Yeah, Primrose Brown's got her own stash which I _may_ have paid Quinta to raid, so there's those. But I thought that first, since it's a girls' night in," The Irish girl's voice dropped to a conspiratorial whisper as she grinned round at them all. "We should have a _talk_."

"Why is it that whenever you say it like that I get the feeling that it's going to end badly for me?" Mary grumbled as she used her wand to levitate clumps of cake batter into paper cases.

"Because you're too stupid to lie whenever someone asks you a personal question. Oh come on, we _never_ get to have a proper talk. And besides," The gossip-loving girl gave her a particularly devious look. "There's always Truth or Dare."

"Not. In. Public." Mary growled, flushing. Lily decided to intervene before a fight broke out.

"Alright, let's humour her Mary." She laughed. She had actually grown quite fond of Emmeline's _talks_ over the past year- there was something about people actually being interested in her deepest secrets and yet knowing that they would never divulge them that she had begun to enjoy. "But don't be _too_ cruel Em, you know Mary won't lie. And _you_ have to answer truthfully too."

Emmeline squealed and threw her hands into the air. "Thank you God! Let's get started! Evil questions first right?"

"Give me a minute I just need to put these in the oven- oh, ta." As Mary awkwardly handed the tray of cakes to a house elf, Emmeline tore into a chocolate frog and looked around at them eagerly. "Go on then. Who's first?"

"Mary?"

"Ye whit?! Why?"

"Because you threatened to use my head as a doorstop this morning and I think that was very rude."

"I'm still considering that actually," But the blonde shrugged easily, plastering her best bored expression across her face, as if that would somehow ward off Emmeline's evil intentions. "Go on then, do your worst."

"I will. To whom- or to what thing- did you last say I love you?"

This seemed like an innocent question but Mary, much to Lily's surprise, went slightly green and didn't answer. Emmeline cackled. "I thought you didn't have anything to hide, MacDonald?"

"I don't, I just- look if you already ken, why d'you need to ask?"

"Never mind, you promised."

"You _besom_. Alright, it was my pillow but- NO- WAIT- SHUT IT-" Mary fumed as Lily choked on her tea and Emmeline let out a scream of laughter.

"Knew it, I knew it! And you tried to pass it off as a sneeze!"

"You don't understand! I had no idea anybody was around! It was a mistake! I was thinking of something else!"

"Really, Mary? Just thinking? Not _doing_ something else as well?" Here Emmeline made a frankly obscene hand gesture, scandalising a passing house elf, and then dissolved into a fit of uncontrollable giggles.

"You just have a dirty mind, Vance! I don't have to answer that- Lily stop laughing and tell her to leave me alone. _Lily_!"

"Hey, you made your bed and now you can- oh, wait, are there pillows in this bed?"

"I'm going to _kill_ you." Mary muttered through gritted teeth and Lily, feeling both slightly intimidated and a bit sorry for her now, tossed her another chocolate frog.

"Oh come on, Mary, it's not that bad," And then, taking a deep breath, she added in a lower tone. "If it makes you feel better, everyone does it. It's nothing new."

"Everyone does what?" Came a voice from behind them, and the three girls shrieked.

Lily whipped round in horror to see James Potter and Sirius Black standing behind her. "What in heavens' name are you two doing here?" She yelped, though as their hands were rather obviously filled with food for the party upstairs, it was a bit of a silly question.

"Could ask the same of you," Potter smiled round at their scarlet faces. "Sorry, just wondering why you three aren't upstairs enjoying the fun. Primrose just jumped McLaggen. I'm told it's very romantic."

"I'm sorry, Potter, but watching two people sucking on each other's faces isn't exactly my idea of fun." Lily shot back, slightly surprised that she was actually able to get any words out at all. Mary, after all, was simply opening and closing her mouth like a goldfish.

Potter shrugged. "Fair enough, we weren't too keen on it either were we, Padfoot?"

"Nah, but I'm much keener on _this_ conversation. What does everyone do, then Evans? Wait, can I guess?"

"No, you certainly cannot!"

"So it's _that_ then. Well, if you ladies ever need any help-"

Lily shoved her fingers in her ears, mentally cursing the unfortunate fact that it just _had_ to be then that, for the first time, Black's dirty mind had come horribly close to the truth. "I don't want to know Black." She pleaded, but this only made him grin wider. "Well, MacDonald, how about you?"

Mary made a noise that was probably supposed to sound threatening, but ended up being about as scary as an angry baby rabbit.

Luckily, Emmeline seemed to have recovered herself enough to come to their aid.

"I don't know about that, Black," She remarked, pretending to consider the matter deeply. "I'd have to ask Remus. I'm sure he won't mind sharing-"

It did the trick. Black's grin froze and immediately he turned on his heel and stalked off. Lily thought she heard him give a small whimper as he went.

James, on the other hand, still had to be dealt with, and he seemed to take great delight in his friend's distress. "When are you going to tell him, Vance?"

"Probably never. Why? Is it working that well?"

"I should say so. He's been trying to get tips off Moony for weeks now- won't take no for an answer, thinks he's hiding something." The three girls laughed at that, starting to feel more at ease again, though Mary still looked a little shell-shocked.

James- wait, no, _Potter- _smiled at them again. "Mind you, could you tone down the imagery a bit? I don't need to think about two of my best mates- well, you know-"

"Oh sorry, if it makes you _uncomfortable_," Emmeline couldn't resist pushing him that bit further. "But don't tell me you've never _thought_ about it? Have you _seen_ the way they look at each other? There's a whole world of desire there that you wouldn't even _believe_."

Her victim gulped and swayed a little. Then he went white as a sheet. "I think I'm going to vomit-" He mumbled and backed away, still limping slightly from his Quidditch injury. "Er, enjoy your night, then. Evans." He nodded to her and she half-raised a hand to wave, before he fled.

There was a pause and then the three girls screamed with laughter.

"You are _evil_." Lily squealed, as Emmeline, with a look of grim triumph on her face, reached for another chocolate frog. "Me, evil? I just saved your necks!"

"I'm pure mortified, so I am." Mary whispered, not even complaining as a house elf handed her a mug of tea and a blanket.

"Ah you brought it on yourself, Mary," Emmeline teased. "No, I'm sorry. I promise never to ask something like that again. But as for _you-_" Here she waved the chocolate frog at Lily. "What was_that?"_

"What? Oh," Lily shrugged as Emmeline imitated the weak hand wave she had given Potter a few moments before. "I don't know, a reflex. Poor sod looked like he needed it. He's not been quite such a prat lately. Anyway, I thought it was my turn to ask the question?"

A glance at the still dazed Mary confirmed that she was in no position to argue for interrogation rights and so Lily settled herself back on her cushion as she considered her question. Then she frowned and swirled her tea around in her mug, suddenly feeling very awkward. "Ok Em, there _is_ actually something we'd like to know. But you don't have to answer if you don't want to, it's quite personal-"

"Really? You think it could be any worse than _her_ sick sense of humour?" Mary muttered from behind her tea.

Emmeline folded her arms and stuck her tongue out at her friend. "I said I'd answer anything, I keep my promises."

"How come you stopped being friends with Skeeter? I mean I know she's a bitch," Lily added hastily. "No offense, it's just that back in second year you seemed really close. I just…" Here she trailed off and took a gulp of her tea. "As I say, you don't have to answer."

Emmeline had become very stiff, her face falling into the cold, pureblood mask she only broke out very rarely. "You were right, she's a bitch and she always has been. But you have to understand… my sister's a lot older than me. I never really had anyone to talk to before Hogwarts. So Rita, well she was really nice at first. Or maybe she was always a cow, I'm not really sure."

Mary had wandered off to check on the cake, but Lily could tell that she was still straining her ears, trying to catch the conversation from amidst a group of bustling house elves.

Emmeline leant in and hissed quickly. "I mean technically it was about Lupin, you know? He's always been really nice to everyone and then Rita made a crack about him in front of Potter and I sort of lost it. But," She cleared her throat loudly as Mary returned to the group and straightened up. "She'd had it coming for months. She- er- she seemed to work out how I felt about her before even I knew and she was always- well I was a bit of a doormat, let's face it. Rita knew she could get away with anything- she's a lot cleverer than you'd think you know. And then she saw me in the library with- when I finally started to work it out, that is, she kept making all these snide comments about how no-one would talk to me if they found out and how she was the only one who understood-"

She broke off, lost in thought. "I suppose I was just fed up being blackmailed you know?"

There was another brief silence and then Mary's blunt voice broke in. "Well, _that_ was deep."

"You wanted to know!" Her friend replied indignantly, stuffing chocolate in her mouth.

"Sorry," Lily found herself going red. "Just so you know Em, we completely agree with you, Skeeter was a right cow-"

"Lils, how _do_ you manage to achieve such a beautiful shade of magenta? Really, it doesn't clash with your hair _at all_. Oh don't go feeling guilty," Emmeline was grinning again, albeit rather weakly. "It's _your_ turn now. Mary, would you like to do the honours?"

"Eh naw, you can leave me out of this."

"Oh come on, you know she'll take it better from you. And anyway," Emmeline assumed a saint-like expression. "I made a promise not to bring it up myself, and I _always_ keep my promises."

"Oh for goodness' sake, just get to the point!" Lily snapped. Was she really so intimidating?

Mary huffed and put down the sprinkles, rolling her eyes. "Alright, so Emmeline's had this theory for a while, and I'll admit I didn't really agree with it at first, but you know I wouldn't be saying this if I wasn't a wee bit suspicious. Basically, we think you might actually fancy James Potter."

For a moment, Lily felt as if she could quite cheerfully strangle the girl sitting in front of her. But, as Emmeline had correctly predicted, she couldn't very well take it out on Mary for telling the truth. Wait, the _truth_? So she liked Potter's hair that didn't- _shut up, shut up, shut up,_ she told her brain furiously. And then, to her utmost horror, she felt her face betraying her as, for the umpteenth time that day, it moved a bit closer to its lifelong dream of becoming a radish.

Emmeline threw her hands up in the air. "See? What did I tell you? She's even blushing."

"No, we'll wait and hear what she has to say first." Mary cut her off, watching Lily curiously. "I'm honestly sorry, it's just you've been acting a bit funny around him lately and we wondered-"

"No!" Lily finally choked out. "I am not in love with Potter! I thought you'd stopped all that?"

Emmeline avoided her glare and looked pleadingly at Mary again, who sighed and clicked her tongue impatiently. "Alright apparently _I'm_ to be the scapegoat here. What Emmeline wants me to tell you, is that I at no point said you were in love with him. That would just be ridiculous at this stage- yes, it would Em, don't you look at me like that. However, I do think it's possible that you could fancy him even if you don't want to- physically at least, ken? If not romantically."

Here she took a deep breath, looking very angry with herself. "Like, for example, I fancy Black and-"

She broke off as Emmeline made cooing noises but Lily folded her arms. "Well, I've never teased you for that…"

Mary simply ground her teeth. "Look, I'm not denying it- almost everyone fancies Black. Which is a real shame, seeing how he's such an awfy eejit. But it's unavoidable and it doesn't mean I'm dying to go out with him, just that he can be very attractive when he wants to be. D'you see what I'm getting at?"

Lily paused, wishing her face would stop burning. What Mary said had its merits and the other girl had been quite valiantly honest throughout her own interrogation. Still, Lily wasn't going to give in that easily.

"No," She muttered after a minute, hoping they wouldn't notice that it was said with rather less conviction than before. "No, I don't see. Look, Potter's been a complete git for years- at what point do you honestly think I'd decide that he was at all fanciable?"

"Well you _did_ gasp when he got injured today-" Emmeline began but Lily immediately shot back. "Half the crowd gasped. His _leg_ was on the other side of the pitch_-_"

"Hey, alright shut up a minute, the baith of youse!" Mary was growing visibly impatient now. "Right, first things first, Lily you said yourself he's been a lot better this year-"

"Great. So I'm supposed to be grateful that he's no longer a complete and utter arse?"

"No, and I think you'd be completely justified in never speaking to him again, if you ask me. But I do think that you've been a bit nicer to him over the past few months as well, ever since you found out about his mum. I don't know, maybe he looked vulnerable-"

Lily spluttered. "Wait, so his mother _dies_ and suddenly I'm attracted to him? Mary do you even realise how _twisted_ that sounds?"

"Oh for crying out loud, why did I get landed with this?" Mary wailed at the ceiling and fled in the direction of her cakes. "That's it, I've done my best. You're on your own now, Em."

Emmeline did not shrink under Lily's glare and polished off another chocolate frog before answering. "What Mary was not so successfully trying to get across, is that since he got his act together _and_ since his mum passed, you seem to have started to realise he's a real person and not this one-dimensional, totally evil bogeyman you've had him pegged as for the last few years. Add to that the fact that you can be physically attracted to someone without actually wanting them to declare their undying love and it's completely possible that you could fancy Potter."

"Yes but Emmie…" Lily was running out of arguments now and twisted her hands in her robes. "Look, when have I ever given any indication that I might fancy him? Really? I mean, what have I done?"

"Well, that little wave back there notwithstanding, there's the fact that you left your Potions essay in the Common Room in full view of Potter and Black when you knew that Remus wouldn't let them copy-"

"-I just forgot it, I went back later-"

"-you went that exact shade of red when we met him coming in from Quidditch the other week-"

"-it was the cold, my cheeks were like ice-"

"-you bought him special chocolate for Christmas-"

"-no, I bought _everyone_ chocolate for Christmas, I just thought the little broomsticks were pretty rad-"

"-you actually smiled when he hexed Mulciber rather than giving him detention-"

"-alright, we both know that Mulciber's a special case-"

"-you couldn't speak for exactly three and a half minutes when McGonagall paired you up with him for human transfiguration, I counted-"

"-I was concentrating, Transfiguration's _hard-_"

"-I _saw_ you glancing at him when we were doing Amortentia in Potions-"

"-what, so I can't even look in his direction now-"

"-and you spent most of Charms on Friday staring at the back of his head."

"He has good _hair._" Lily hissed and then smacked a hand over her mouth. "No, I meant to say that Flitwick put him in front of us and so how could I- stop it! Stop!"

For once Emmeline stifled her giggles and gave her a sympathetic look. "Ok, ok but we're agreed, physically at least, you _do_ fancy James."

"Maybe." She wanted to sink through the floor. "But it'll go away soon, it's like Mary said about Black, he's just sometimes- ugh!"

She buried her face in her robes as Mary wandered back over, bearing a plate of undecorated fairy cakes and a tub of ice cream, the latter of which she dug into enthusiastically as she shot Emmeline a reproving look. "You just had to break her didn't you? Look Lily, it's no that big a deal. I get it, he's funny and good-looking but it might go away. And Pettigrew says that Potter disnae even fancy you anymore, so there's no need to worry about him asking you out- what?"

Emmeline had made a strange noise somewhere between a cough and a laugh and the two other girls turned to her expectantly. "You really believe that? My God Mary, did you believe me when I said Morgan le Fay was my mother too?"

"Well how does it change things anyroad?" Lily said weakly. "If he starts singing in the Entrance Hall again…"

"What? No, of course not! Lily, this is very different. He still likes you, he just doesn't want to admit it because he's finally realised that last year he was a complete prick about it!" Emmeline sighed. "I admit, they're a bit gallus, Potter and Black but…"

_So he's changing,_ a little voice in Lily's head was arguing, drowning out the other girl. _Am I meant to think that's attractive?_

Although, to tell the truth, she actually did. Just a little bit. Maybe even flattered that someone would change that much just to impress her.

_Oh God, where's your pride, Evans? Next thing you know you'll be making sarnies for him and letting people call you a 'bird'. Don't be such a ninny._

Emmeline was still talking as she shook herself out of her thoughts. "And no, I'm not saying you should be grateful. You're under no obligation to like Potter just because he's stopped yelling propositions at you over dinner. But you know me, I'm a bit of a romantic at heart. I think it's quite nice that he's really changing. Especially since he doesn't seem to know that he's doing it for you."

For the third time that night there was a long silence. Eventually, Lily let out a defeated sigh and clutched at her tea. "Maybe you're right, but it doesn't matter. So I maybe fancy him a little bit. I'm working on that. It's not going any further. Now can we leave it alone? End of discussion about James Potter."

Perhaps it was because she looked so exhausted or perhaps her arguments had finally gotten through to them but instead of commenting any further, they simply exchanged a glance and shrugged.

"Ok, end of." Emmeline said, patting her shoulder and handing her a chocolate frog.

"Cake's ready." Mary said, spreading the last of the icing with her wand.

"My turn." Lily said, giving the other girls her most menacing stare as she decided whether to attack the chocolate or fairy cake first. Eventually, she came to a conclusion.

"Mary MacDonald, is it true that you have, in your own words, a 'lumber' for next Hogsmeade weekend, and if so what exactly does that mean? Are you taking a tree?"

* * *

"Did you _have_ to bring up the pillow?" Mary grumbled, as she gathered up the plum cushions and finished off the last of the fairy cakes. Their little party had gone on for four hours, during which time they had played three games of Exploding Snap, eaten their way through a small mountain of sweets, and discussed almost every aspect of their love lives in excruciating detail. Now, Emmeline having shooed Lily away to bed ("It's technically your party, you don't have to clean up"), it was just the two of them left behind. Well, and a hundred odd house elves.

"Well, you brought the bloody Malfoy wedding so I'd say we're even- and just so we're clear, I did _not_ choose to wear that dress nor to be photographed," Emmeline shot back. "And besides, I'm rather more interested in what Lily had to say about Potter."

"Em you know she might just kill you if you ask her if she fancies him again. And I don't fancy watching what'll probably only be the second or third instance in history of a person being _shouted_ to death."

"Hey, I'm not _that_ stupid. And besides, we already established that she fancies him. Now it's just about moving it to the next stage."

"No bloody way. I refuse to be a part of any more of your daft schemes. Remember Valentine's Day? I was covered in that pink stuff for days and she didn't even notice a thing-"

"Don't you worry, Mary. I'm not going to push her any further than she's comfortable with. I have everything under control."

"Why does that _not_ make me feel any better about this?"

_**Well, what did you think? There's a nice box down there that I would love it if you took the time to put your comments in :)**_

_**Chapter title (rather obviously) from the Beatles' 1967 song of the same name.**_


	7. Changes

_**Changes: August- October, 1977**_

Seventh year brought a lot of surprises- both good and bad, but as far as Lily Evans' and James Potter's love lives were concerned, Emmeline Vance (and to some extent Remus Lupin) was at least convinced the surprises were mostly good.

The day that the Hogwarts owl brought Lily Evans her final letter, she had already spent most of the morning digging out the previous six and sticking them up on her bedroom wall, lining them up carefully next to the O.W.L. results and band posters and family photographs. But this year she could pin an extra piece of paper up there, swelling with pride and happiness as she laid the shiny Head Girl badge on her desk.

When the news had first arrived, she had sprinted down to the kitchen, yelling excitedly, and barrelled into her father with so much force that the tea he was carrying nearly went all over poor Petunia, who, it seemed had news of her own which she had deigned to share with her family. Her sister, predictably, wasn't too pleased at having her thunder stolen, and no matter how much Lily ooh-ed and aah-ed over the sparkling new ring on her left hand, the atmosphere remained tense for the rest of her visit. But for once Lily didn't care and she soon escaped to the canal towpath and strolled along in the sunshine, in the vague direction of her old primary school. Not only Minerva McGonagall, but also _Albus Dumbledore himself_, thought she was Head Girl material! That was enough to make anyone giddy.

* * *

When James Potter felt the lump inside the envelope, he had immediately grown suspicious and backed away from the letter. Had someone managed to tamper with it before it arrived? Was it Sirius' idea of a joke or something altogether more sinister? But after ten minutes of circling the parchment warily, whilst Iris pecked curiously at the stiff Hogwarts messenger, he finally forced himself to take the plunge, tearing along the bottom tentatively and holding out his palm to catch the small object that dropped out.

Two minutes later he was kicking at the door of Sirius' room. "That wasn't funny Padfoot! I nearly had a heart attack!"

His best friend stuck his head around the door, bleary-eyed. "The hell, Prongs? It's like, midnight or something."

"It's three in the afternoon, you git. Here, take your badge back- I don't even want to know how you got ahold of it. Is it Moony's?"

"What badge?" Sirius' eyes widened at the sight of the small shield in his friend's hand. "No way- where'd you get that? Did Moony really get Head Boy? Is he here?"

James rolled his eyes. "Come off it, you knew all along. Now give it back to him."

"Oi, I've got nothing to do with- with whatever it is you're accusing me of. Wait, what _are_ you accusing me of?"

"You know damn well that you put this thing in my letter." James said exasperatedly. "Alright fine, I'll admit it was quite funny. Now take it back."

But Sirius was shaking his head looking more than a little disturbed. "Nah mate, I didn't touch your letter." James scoffed and his friend added indignantly. "I didn't! Here, let me see that." He snatched the envelope out of James' hand and rifled through its contents, pulling out an extra piece of parchment that James hadn't noticed before. "Aha!"

It was only when Sirius sank back against the door frame, almost sobbing with laughter, that it finally hit James just what exactly was going on. And it was with a shudder that he realised what an awful fate he had been landed with. But, for all his misgivings, there was something about the badge in his hand that made him straighten his back and even smile as he wandered dazedly back to his room, leaving Sirius howling on the carpet. Maybe it wouldn't be so bad after all…

* * *

Gripped by euphoria, Lily had felt unusually daring and rushed down the street to the telephone box, punching in Mary's number. Within minutes, a pair of loud cracks sounded down by the cut and Lily found herself ambushed by two very noisy teenage girls, as they yelled delightedly and thumped her on the back.

"I kent you'd get it, I kent it!"

"Head Girl- you bloody swot!"

"Go on then, give us a look!"

"Swot!"

After all the shouting died down, the three friends flung themselves down by the canal and Emmeline plied her with questions. "Did you think you were going to get it? I mean you were bound to, all the teachers love you and you know, even I might be persuaded to admit you're not actually that bad. But did you have any idea?

Lily shook her head, blushing. She supposed she had hoped, years ago, but in recent months the possibility of becoming Head Girl had gone clean out of her mind. She'd been looking further ahead, to what she'd do after leaving school, and in a way that should have made a mere Head Girl badge look small, no matter how shiny. But instead it actually helped- if she was going to fight, she felt she'd go into it actually believing that she had a chance now, and that people thought she was worth something, rather than hoping just to survive.

Mary, on the other hand, looked thoughtful. "I wonder who got Head Boy then? D'you reckon it would be Lupin?"

Lily shrugged. "The letter didn't say. I was thinking they'd maybe ask Bulstrode- you know, to keep the other Slytherins in line. He's not a prefect but it's happened before."

Emmeline wrinkled her nose. "Bulstrode? Well, I suppose it's better than Aubrey. But really, you want someone to make those late patrols _worthwhile._" She dodged Lily's gentle punch, with all the grace of someone who had had a lot of practice. "Lupin's a nice lad I suppose, but I don't think he's really your type. Somebody a more _adventurous_\- you need someone a bit more swashbuckling in your life-"

This time Lily's smack connected successfully with her friend's arm as Mary tilted her nose upwards and began in an exaggeratedly snooty voice. "Why my dear Miss Vance, one does not simply become Head Girl to- how should I put it- _get a lumber_. Our fine, upstanding Miss Evans is far above such disgusting proclivities…"

"Maybe, but I bet James Potter isn't." Emmeline said slyly. Lily was bewildered. "What on earth has he got to do with this? Emmie, you know full well he's over that stage-"

Mary shrugged. "Aye well maybe. But besides, do you think Lily could really get away with putting him in detention for the sole purpose of-"

"That's not what I meant," Emmeline sighed as Lily squealed at Mary's comment and aimed another smack in her direction. "It's just that a little bird named Remus Lupin let slip that Potter got his letter this morning- and guess what was inside that too?"

Lily halted abruptly in her attempts to strangle Mary, her head snapping round to goggle at Emmeline, mouth hanging open loosely. After a moment she seemed able to shake her head slightly, saying weakly. "Oh you're not serious…You can't be _serious_…"

"No but Black is," Emmeline said, picking at a daisy idly as if entirely oblivious to her friend's catatonic state. "He told Remus, who told me- and I've no reason to disbelieve them- that James got Head Boy. He thought it was a joke at first apparently, but well, there you are."

Mary was the first to react, letting out a howl of laughter. "I cannae believe it! Is Dumbledore mental? Or maybe- d'you reckon this is McGonagall's idea of a laugh? What the- wait, Lily are you ok- Lily stop-"

Emmeline and Mary bent anxiously over their friend as she curled herself into a foetal position on the grass, hands covering her brick-red face and groaning weakly. "I'm never going to hear the end of this, am I?"

* * *

For all his usual arrogance, James wasn't quite so keen to share his new position with other people. Though it was impossible to stop Sirius from owling Remus and Peter (and Merlin knew who they'd told- probably half the school) he said no more about it over the rest of the holidays, despite his best friend's frequent attempts to provoke him. Eventually Sirius just gave up, except to occasionally glance over at him and shake his head sadly. In his opinion, there hadn't been seen such clear signs of insanity since they had walked in on Peter the previous Valentine's day, covered in some kind of glittering pink gunk and tearing to pieces a huge paper heart (which he had unfortunately managed to flush down the toilet before either of them could read it- a complete basket case if ever Sirius had seen one).

It was only as he was hauling his trunk down the stairs on September 1st that he finally raised the issue. Or rather he was forced to when Iris, shooting around the house like a comet, knocked him off his feet and the contents of his pockets spilled onto the floor. And, though Charlus Potter was not particularly bothered by the avalanche of old sweet packets that now littered his carpet, he was more than a little interested in the polished shield that his son was digging frantically out of the mess.

Sirius, who had been engaged in the difficult task of catching Iris and coaxing her into her cage, was all too happy to explain. "James is Head Boy!" He crowed gleefully as the owl nipped at his fingers.

James' father stared at his guilty-looking son and then snatched the badge out of his hand. "Here, let me see that."

For the next five minutes he stood scrutinising the shield, shaking it and tapping it with his wand and muttering to himself. When James finally managed to grab it back, he fell to his knees in mock anguish and raised his hands to the sky. "Where did we go wrong, oh Lord? Dorea darling, what did we do to deserve such a terrible thing to happen to our family?"

"Oh shut up." James grumbled, as Sirius fell about laughing at his father's antics. But he couldn't stay annoyed. It was the first time Charlus Potter had smiled in months.

"So who's Head Girl?" His father eventually asked, wiping mock tears from his eyes. Again, Sirius was prompt to answer, shooting James a sly glance. "Lily Evans. She's in Gryffindor too- you've probably heard about him swooning over her?"

Charlus nodded, grinning even wider, but James was aghast, goggling at Sirius with a look of utmost betrayal. "You never told me that!"

"Thought you'd have guessed. What was it you said in fourth year again? She was the most capable, beautiful creature you'd ever seen and- oi, come back- Prongs!"

But James was already pelting back up the stairs and dived in to his room, slamming the door behind him as he threw his arms over his head. "I'm not going back! You can't make me- I'm not going!"

* * *

Eventually, Sirius and James' father between them must have managed to extract the boy from his sanctuary, because as Lily hauled her trunk down Platform Nine and Three Quarters, his was the first Gryffindor face she saw amongst the sea of excited first years leaping onto the train, awkward-looking third years trying to extract themselves from their parents' tentacles, and a group of Hufflepuff seventh years attempting to hide their rather obvious pre-term partying hangovers from the Magical Law Enforcement Patrolmen who had been assigned to watch the school. Almost as soon as she caught James' eye, however, he ducked away again, his face being replaced by Sirius Black's Cheshire Cat grin and Peter Pettigrew's curious expression. Pushing it out of her mind hurriedly, Lily levitated her trunk onto the train and pushed her way down the corridor of the Hogwarts Express, looking for a compartment. Eventually, she caught sight of Mary's face in the window of one at the end of the carriage and sidled in, only to immediately wish that she had turned and fled the other way.

The fact that all nine of Gryffindor's seventh years were packed like sardines into one small space was bad enough, but, while Lily was reasonably friendly with Primrose Brown and Quinta Dunbar, she could have done without having to squeeze in next to a certain messy-haired boy who was determinedly avoiding her eye. Lily was nothing if not charitable though, and eventually Mary's unashamed staring became too much and she nudged Potter, plastering a smile on her face. "Heard you got made Head Boy."

James seemed a little taken aback by her decision to speak to him, and in such friendly tones too, and for a moment he simply opened and closed his mouth like a guppy. Luckily though, the situation did not develop in the same way as it had in a similar set of circumstances the previous year and James did not start to choke out a proposition (was she a little disappointed? No, that was silly. _Shut up brain._)

"Yeah," He gave a stilted laugh. "Think Dumbledore's going a bit barmy, to be honest. Still, you deserved Head Girl. Well done."

"Well don't put yourself down so quickly," Lily found herself saying and then added in a low voice that she hoped Primrose Brown couldn't hear. "You can't be worse than McLaggen."

James shrugged, scoffing slightly. "Is that a challenge? Exploding vodka in the library's easy. I could do better than that before our first class."

"Don't you dare!" Lily warned, but a smile danced around her lips all the same. "Anyway, being Head Boy can't be that bad. I suppose we just have to make sure Avery doesn't start ducking first years in the lake again."

"My pleasure." This was said with such grim satisfaction that Lily was suddenly seized by a worrying thought and finished hastily. "But don't- you know, we shouldn't be too hard on the Slytherins."

James paused. "I'm not going to put Snape in detention without a reason, if that's what you mean." He said slowly, looking stung.

"That's not what I- I just meant-" Lily was suddenly very aware that the rest of the compartment seemed to be listening into their conversation, and cursed her mouth for betraying her. And it had been going so well too! "You're just new to this and I thought-"

"You thought I can't be trusted, I get it." He looked so uncomfortable that Lily bit her lip anxiously and tried again. "That's not- I'm sorry, I didn't mean to-"

"It's ok. Don't worry though, I'll try not to muck it up." James shrugged again, but this time with the air of someone wanting to finish the conversation and he turned to the person who happened to be sitting on his left. "So Quinta- you able to make Quidditch this year? We could do with a better keeper."

Mary was watching Lily keenly and she turned away angrily to dig a copy of the British Charms Association's monthly review out of her bag. _Well that went just swimmingly_.

* * *

"She bloody hates me, Moony." James hissed, as the two boys slunk into the kitchens the following evening, taking a well-earned break in their attempts to track down a mutinous band of fourth years that they had spotted lurking around the Hufflepuff Common Room, but who now seemed to have done a well-timed bunk. In a way, James was quite relieved; even Professor McGonagall found fourth years a nightmare to discipline. And, since James had been the worst of the bunch in his day, Hogwarts' current batch of mutinous fourteen year olds were even less inclined to listen to the boy who had once dared Peeves to drop dungbombs on their heads just as they were about to be sorted.

Remus Lupin rolled his eyes. This was the third such conversation they had had that day and the usually placid boy was now more than a little irritated. "You're completely over-reacting again James."

"I am not- I'm a terrible Head Boy, Dumbledore should've chosen you. Yesterday-" James shuddered at the thought. "I can't even make a simple speech!"

"Look, I think you did a wonderful impression of a dead haddock," Remus said kindly, as several obliging house elves piled crumpets and muffins into a box. "Oh come on, I actually think it might have done you a favour. Emmeline says MacDonald thinks Lily likes you better when you look, er, vulnerable."

This did not cheer James up. After about ten minutes of painful socialising with his fellow seventh years in a sweltering, packed train compartment the previous day, the new Head Boy had then to make his way, for the first time, to the prefects' compartment, where, it turned out, he was expected to give some kind of rousing speech to the troops. Needless to say, he had failed miserably, and had stood staring ahead in panic like a deer caught in the headlights for several minutes until Lily Evans had arrived and taken pity on him. The memory still produced an urge to run back to the dormitory and hide, even as house elves plied him with tea.

"Right, so either she thinks I'm a prize dickhead or I can't be allowed out without a nanny. Great." He sloshed his tea around in the mug gloomily. "What happened to me, Moony? I used to be _cool_."

Remus didn't bother to disguise his snort. "If you say so. Listen to me James, you seriously need to get over yourself. If you can't tell people you'll be a good Head Boy then stop moping around and _show_ them you can be one."

"How am I supposed to do that? Nobody's going to listen to _me_."

"Well, apparently you used to be 'cool' so if they listened to you then, they can listen now. Being Head Boy isn't just about confiscating stink pellets off first years you know- leave that bit to the rest of us if you want. It's about being a good leader. And alright, fine, you can't make a speech to save your life whenever Lily's around but otherwise you've got leadership coming off you in spades."

"Lily's better."

His friend sighed. "Lily's got natural authority, true. And she's really very kind and means well. But she can be very- she can seem pretty perfect sometimes and that can be a bit intimidating. I mean, just look at the way you act when she's around! I'm sure she wants to help but some people are going to see her as unapproachable. Even Mulciber's terrified of her! And that's where _you_ come in."

"Anyone can be an agony aunt. You're actually doing a pretty good job yourself, Moony." James mumbled into his tea, though he looked slightly happier.

"Well, I'm not the oh-so-cool and popular James Potter am I? Look, I was just giving you an example, you really need to figure this out yourself for once. Dumbledore's not as mad as he looks, he made you Head Boy for a reason. And Lily knows that too- she's just looking for you to prove it to her." Remus conjured a large sack and began stuffing it with food. "Ok, now we've got this little heart-to-heart over with, are you going to help or not?"

James grinned as a house elf seized his empty tea cup and brushed away a mock tear. "Have we finally corrupted you? Our little Moony, all grown up and stealing food from the kitchens!"

"Shut up, I _need_ chocolate."

* * *

"My turn: first kiss."

"Never going to happen." Mary traced a circle on the surface of the lake with her foot, looking slightly bored.

"Don't be so negative! Alright, well mine was James Potter. We were thirteen, it was very awkward, and I never want to speak about it again." Quinta Dunbar grimaced and turned to the girl on her right. "Go on Lily, is the answer going to surprise us?"

Lily started. Her fellow Gryffindor's admission had sent her mind spinning off in strange directions and it took her a moment to clear her head. "Er, probably not. Remember when I went out with Edmund Macmillan? Yeah, him."

"Ooh, mine was with his brother Ewan," Primrose Brown nudged her elbow with a sly smile. "We could have been sisters-in-law!"

"Mm, yes." Lily gave a nervous giggle, trying to disguise the fact that, as much as she liked Primrose, she didn't think that being in-laws would have been a great idea, even if she'd had any intention of marrying the first person she kissed. Or even the second. When it happened. _If_ it happened.

The others were all looking expectantly at Emmeline now. "I thought the questioner didn't have to answer?"

"Oh come on Emmeline, when it's you, you _have_ to answer." Quinta rolled her eyes.

Emmeline looked stricken for a second and then grinned. "Fine, it was Esther Macmillan. So we've got the whole lot between us." And she sat back on her heels, rather enjoying the roar of laughter with which Mary greeted this statement (as well as the slightly awkward glances which passed between Quinta and Primrose).

An hour later, when the Gryffindor girls' bonding session had finally come to its torturous conclusion, Lily found herself kicking moodily at the trunk of one of the nearby beeches as Emmeline disposed of the tell-tale firewhiskey and Rhonabwy's Rum empties with a quick vanishing spell. Though she would usually have enjoyed the fact that it had been an abnormally sunny day for October, she had not been in the mood for 'girl talk' and, for some reason, Quinta Dunbar's answer continued to niggle at her brain.

"Hey, what did the poor tree ever do to you?" Emmeline called merrily, handing her some of the remaining full bottles of rum. "Here hold these for me. You alright? You're acting weird. Was it the question Mary asked about that line in 'Scales and Serpents'? Because that freaked me out too- I didn't think she even knew that book existed…"

"How come you never told us about Esther Macmillan?" Lily deflected, as she booted the tree again, swaying unsteadily. "I didn't know you'd been out with anyone."

"Woah watch out, you'll do yourself an injury. And no, we didn't go out, we just kissed."

"Is that who Rita caught you in the library with?" She countered, eager to delve into other people's problems rather than focus on her own. "How come you never said? And how come you never went out? Did she not like it?"

Emmeline paused, uncorking a bottle of firewhiskey and taking a swig before answering. "I don't know. She kissed me though, not the other way round. We never talked about it afterwards. I kind of- well, I ran out of the room. I suppose I was a bit confused back then."

"But didn't you ever say that to her?" Lily swung round to stare at her friend incredulously.

Emmeline shrugged. "Never seemed like the right time. So we just… don't talk about it."

"But she probably thinks it's her fault! And you're the one who's always saying we only live once and we should take a chance where we can!"

"I know, I'm not proud of it," Her friend mumbled, cradling the firewhiskey. "But- you wouldn't get it, Lils. And besides, it was years ago now. We're friends and that's fine for both of us." She plonked herself down on the grass and gazed up at Lily defiantly. "Anyway, I doubt that you're all cut up over my sadly non-existent love life. What's really eating at you? Come on, I told you mine."

Lily sighed and flopped onto the grass beside her friend, leaning back against the tree and breaking into the rum. "Quinta. She said she kissed James back when they were thirteen."

"That's really what's worrying you? Listen, I don't think you need to be concerned about what happened back then. Dunbar knows what James' Quidditch kit smells like after a match, she probably doesn't want anything to do with him now. By the way though, you could totally take her, you know, if it came to a duel or something…"

"That's not what I meant, I'm not that petty!" Lily whined, stabbing at the ground with a finger to make her point. "I just- you remember what he was like in third year? He fancied a different girl every week! Well, why did he settle on me? Why didn't he move on?"

Emmeline hesitated and then shook her head, hiccoughing. "I don't know. I really don't know. Maybe that's just how love works. You don't know why you keep loving someone but you do. Mind you, how should I know?"

"Love!" Horrified, Lily felt her eyes fill with tears. "He can't be in love with me, I'm too horrible. What if I hurt him?"

"Lils you're not horrible, what a terrible thing to say! And you won't hurt him if you're honest with him. Take it from someone who's never been honest. Look where it got me!" Here Emmeline sought out the warm glow of firewhiskey again and gave a small chuckle. Then, glancing at her friend, she sat up and pushed the bottle away. "Oh no wait, Lily don't cry. What's wrong?"

"Nothing, it's really stupid!" The redhead sobbed, wiping her nose on her sleeve. "I don't know why I'm crying. I just- I really do fancy James Potter, don't I? Like, really fancy him?"

"Yeah, I think you do." Emmeline said quietly and then smiled, patting her on the shoulder. "It's alright though, I'll help you make it go away and so will Mary. You just need a lot of chocolate and a hot Quidditch player-"

"But I don't want it to go away!" Lily bawled into her skirt. "One day I love him and then I hate him and it's awful but I don't want to stop- oh for heavens' sake, why am I crying? I'm Head Girl! I shouldn't be crying like this!"

"You shouldn't be consuming alcohol on school grounds, either," Emmeline giggled. "But you seem to have that in the bag so… oh come on, lighten up. So you fancy James a bit, what's the worst that could happen?"

"I might want to marry him!"

Emmeline blinked and shook her head as if trying to clear her ears. "You might want to- oh dear. Oh _dear_."

* * *

Luckily, Lily missed the wicked smile creeping across her face.

"Well, how are you feeling Pete?" James asked anxiously, as his friend stirred painfully.

A slow, weak grin spread across the other boy's face, barely visible under all the bandages but there nonetheless. "I did it Prongs. I beat him. I showed him."

"That you did, Wormtail," James patted his friend's leg in congratulations but leapt away at the other boy's cry of pain. "Oh shit, sorry! Are you alright?"

"Yeah, yeah." Peter Pettigrew gazed up at the hospital wing ceiling in a dreamy trance. "Did you see his face? He was _furious_."

"Yeah I know." _I had to deal with him afterwards._

As it happened, Peeves the Poltergeist was not good at being the butt of a joke, especially not if it involved him being locked in an enchanted girls' toilet cubicle. And the girls who used that particular bathroom were none too pleased either. It was only a question of who got to Peter first, and as James had been rather preoccupied keeping the latter, led by the slightly terrifying Emmeline Vance, under control, he had neglected to warn his friend that the poltergeist had been released from his prison and so poor Peter had found himself being dragged face first down several flights of stairs until Professor Flitwick came to his rescue. It was thus a somewhat guilty-looking James Potter who had turned up to the hospital wing half an hour later, nervously polishing his glasses on his sleeve and rather nervous that Madam Pomfrey was about to ambush him from the shadows.

Peter was slipping off to sleep again but suddenly jerked himself awake. "Oh wait I had something to tell you-"

"Ah, I see you found him," The Head Girl's voice cut him off and James leapt up, edging warily between Lily Evans and his friend. She gave a very un-Lily-esque high, tinkling laugh. "Don't worry, I'm not going to hurt you Peter."

"Er, thank you?"

"No problem," Lily smiled at the injured boy and then her gaze jumped to James, who sub-consciously tried to flatten his hair into a more presentable style. The redhead looked at him curiously. "What on earth are you doing?"

"Nothing I- so what brings you up here?" James stuffed his hands in his pockets and gave her his friendliest grin.

Lily's own smile faltered however. "Actually, it's- it's quite bad. I'm looking for Pomfrey- and you probably need to know too. There's been an attack."

"An- when you say attack, you don't mean the Giant Squid finally snapped and ate a fourth year do you?" He joked weakly.

Lily shook her head seriously, and James swore. "Who? How? What the hell's going on? How serious is it?"

"Very nasty, they think he's in a coma. And it was only a second year too- you know Kingsley Shacklebolt?"

James nodded. The kid was one of Sirius' little fanclub of first and second years, though he'd always seemed a bit more sensible than the rest of his friends. But definitely far too young to be traumatised in such a way. "But he's pureblood, they don't think-"

Lily shrugged sadly. "I don't think anyone's safe anymore."

"Do they know who did it?" Peter's shaky voice broke in. "Or why?"

But Lily only shrugged again, helpless. "I just need to find Madam Pomfrey."

"Yeah, you go do that," James picked up his bag, looking determined. "I'll go and see that Kingsley's friends are alright, don't want them doing anything stupid. And we should probably make sure everyone returns to their common rooms- are there prefects on that already?"

"Well I'm not sure, McGonagall just said-"

"Alright don't worry, I'll get it," Lily shot him a grateful look and hurried off as James patted Peter's leg again. "Oh sorry mate, I forgot. Anyway look, I'll be back up as soon as I can-"

"Yeah but-"

"-it's just I'm supposed to deal with this stuff-"

"-Prongs can I say something first?"

"What?" To tell the truth, James wasn't really listening and he glanced around the hospital wing, distracted, wondering how on earth he was supposed to explain to a group of twelve year olds that their friend had been brutally attacked.

Peter was smiling again beneath the bandages. "When I was in that bathroom there was something written on the back of the door, about Lily fancying you-"

"Really, now's not the time-"

"I'm just saying, she looked pretty impressed with this whole Head Boy thing you're doing at the moment. And, well, MacDonald's not great at keeping secrets- you might want to ask her…" The other boy was slipping off again, but at least a part of James' brain was interested and fighting with his conscience to stay and hear more. "Just thought you'd be a bit happier…"

James hesitated for a second. "Look thanks mate, but we'll talk about it later." He finally decided, backing away. "Look after yourself."

But as he ran from the hospital wing, he couldn't deny that there were some very conflicted feelings fighting to break loose of his stomach. And the next day, as the Gryffindor seventh years paused on their way out of Herbology to stare at the group of grim-looking Aurors marching up from the school gates, James at least had one hopeful thought to keep him warm throughout the gloom.

* * *

It seemed silly really but, if it hadn't been for the war, Lily might never have had the determination or courage to make what would later become one of her favourite memories. With the constant Auror presence and worried shopkeepers making Hogsmeade visits a tense and unhappy business, and the weather putting a damper on any Quidditch matches or visits to Hagrid's, weekends in late 1977 had quickly become a tedious and miserable affair, school of magic or not. And this was only exacerbated by the subdued air with which most of her classmates seemed to go about their business nowadays- something which had begun with the first attack on Kingsley Shacklebolt and had not lifted. Every night, Lily watched as another familiar face entered the Great Hall in a thoughtful daze and sat down to pick at their dinner in silence. First it had been Hufflepuffs like Florence Dalziel and the Macmillans, which she had found odd but nothing particularly worrying. But soon it was spreading to her fellow Gryffindor seventh years, starting with Quinta Dunbar and Peter Pettigrew and then moving onto Remus Lupin and even Mary who, despite Lily and Emmeline's worried faces and determined questioning, for once seemed remarkably secretive about the whole affair.

"They'll get round to you eventually," Was all she could be persuaded to say on the matter. "You won't have to wait long, and then you'll find out. It's ok, nothing bad. I think."

And, eventually, Lily did find out. 'They' turned out to be Albus Dumbledore and the Auror in charge of the force guarding the school, a grizzled-looking man named Alastor Moody. Professor McGonagall had been there too, though she had left early on, lips pursed disapprovingly. And what the Headmaster had had to say had been… well, Lily hadn't been quite sure what to think at first. But her doubts had vanished very quickly, and perhaps she should have been suspicious of that, but at the time she hadn't been in any mood to be overly cautious. This was her chance at last, an offer to help make a difference. And who wouldn't seize that with both hands and damn the consequences?

It was only on her way back up to the Gryffindor Common room that the full weight of her choice began to settle on her shoulders. It meant being careful for a start, much, much more careful. Mary had grasped that even before she had. They had started with the loyal Hufflepuffs for a reason, and then, when moving onto Gryffindor, the half-bloods and the muggleborns first, the ones they thought they could trust more easily. Did that mean she was to be wary too now, even of those she considered friends? Could she really treat Emmeline- someone both she and Mary had placed all their trust in- as a possible threat? No, they would get round to asking her soon too. Emmeline was as trustworthy as any Hufflepuff. They were just holding back, to be sure. They had a right to be cautious, after all.

At the top of the stairs, Lily's eyes found another pair. Though a familiar shade of hazel, and usually dancing with merriment, tonight they held an expression not dissimilar to how she imagined her own must look- vague and ghost-like. Not quite sad, but certainly downcast, as if inside their heads they were trying to subtly rearrange the world they knew, without losing control and blowing it to pieces.

"You're the first pure-blood they asked." Lily remarked bluntly as they met on the stair. There was little cause for dancing around the subject.

James Potter shrugged. "They said I couldn't tell Sirius." He answered, with a disbelieving laugh. "It's ridiculous."

He was clearly doing his best to be blasé about the subject, but his eyes said it all. Suddenly, Lily was seized with a desire to shake him, shout at him, anything to make them both snap out of this strange humour. It was what they had both wanted, wasn't it- to fight? They should have been determined, angry, punching the air in satisfaction, maybe even laughing with false confidence. Not this awful despondence, as if someone had already died.

Instead, she heard herself echoing Mary, but in a voice much firmer and steadier. "He'll know soon enough. We'll all know and then we can-"

"-we can focus on… preparing. Yeah, I get it. It's just shit." James ran a hand through his hair, looking tired. "They haven't told Vance yet either, have they? D'you reckon they'll ask Brown?"

This time, it was Lily's turn to shrug. "I hope for Quinta's sake they do." Then, after a guilty pause, she blurted out. "Is that bad? To want your friends to be in this with you, even if they might get hurt?"

"They'd deserve to know, either way," His voice had regained something of its old stubbornness. "You know Emmeline wouldn't betray you. And Sirius wouldn't betray me."

"Nobody's going to betray anyone," Lily said fiercely, though doubts still crawled in the back of her mind. In a slightly quieter voice, and without even realising until after it was said, she found herself adding. "I can trust you can't I?"

James blinked at her incredulously for a second, the vagueness fading from his eyes as the colour rose in his face. "I er- I-" He spluttered, gulping and Lily worried that he was about to go into his usual catatonic state. But a moment later he had straightened his back and looked her directly in the eye.

"Look," He began, taking a deep breath. "I know I've been a git before. And I know you've got no reason to believe me. But I'm trying to change, really. I know I'm not a great Head Boy or anything but if there's one thing I'm sure about, it's that I never want to let you down and so I'm doing my best to get better at it. Lily you're an amazing person, and I-" Here, he swallowed, but ploughed on determinedly. "I know I'm not even half that but I do know that I can't change the way you make me feel. I tried, but I can't. And even though I know you don't feel the same way, I swear I'm not going to betray you. I don't think I could ever do that. I promise. Not for anyone."

For the first time in her life, Lily Evans was lost for words.

She opened her mouth and then closed it. And then opened and closed again. Her brain was scrambling her thoughts, trying to sort through them and knit some kind of coherent answer but without much success. Quite simply, she had nothing to say.

Her silence seemed to unnerve James though and he raised a hand to his hair, finishing lamely. "So yeah, I reckon you can trust me? Sorry, I'll just-"

But the rest of his sentence was lost as Lily stepped forward, her face pale but her mind filled with a single thought. And, grabbing the front of James' shirt and pulling his face towards hers, something inside of her had decided that there was only one way to execute it.

There were no fireworks going off outside the window, no angelic choirs descending from the heavens. To all outside appearances, they were just another couple wrestling on the stairwell, and, as Lily had once quite crudely put it, 'sucking on each other's faces'. But for the actors themselves, holding onto each other in that one moment seemed like clutching at a lifeline in the middle of a tossing sea, or taking a deep draught of water on a sweltering day, or perhaps even like touching the end of a frayed wire, in that the shock the kiss sent through their minds had somehow electrified their thoughts and cleared away all the miserable vagueness of before. For a very brief time, they could focus entirely on each other, Lily resting against James' forehead and giggling softly as her nose bumped his glasses crooked, as he in turn ran a hand through her hair and pressed forward eagerly, catching her lips again.

And then suddenly, all too soon, it was over. The noise of the Common Room spilled out onto the air as someone pushed open the portrait hole and they sprang apart, stumbling backwards over the stairs.

"Mate, I've been looking for you everywhere- Moony's gone and nicked the bloody map…" Sirius Black's casual tone and easy grin cut through atmosphere like a knife, as he sauntered up behind them. "Prongs? Prooongs? You look like you've seen a ghost."

He waved a hand in front of James' face. The bespectacled boy simply flung out an arm to steady himself against his friend. Black turned to stare accusingly at the flushed redhead opposite. "What did you do to him?"

Lily coughed and turned her face away though a voice in her head was quite happily squealing the answer. _I kissed him. Oh crikey I just kissed James Potter! Oh God, I- what do I do now?_

_Fight or flight, _Another voice, that sounded a lot like Mary, was telling her. _You've got a choice between those. Either kiss him again or walk away._

James didn't look like he was about to say anything any time soon. Black, on the other hand, was still waiting for an answer. _Go on, where's your Gryffindor courage Lily?_

But her face was flushing and her resolve wilting, and she knew that, unless James said something soon, her legs wouldn't have the courage to stand still for much longer. And, since the only thing he seemed to be doing was slipping back into his well-honed impression of a haddock, that didn't seem likely.

Black never got his answer, though not for lack of trying. It took about thirty more seconds before the knocking of Lily's knees eventually became too much for her and she rushed from the scene, pushing past them both towards the portrait hole and sprinting up the stairs to the Girls dormitories. Dismissing Primrose Brown's worried questions with a wave of her hand, she yanked the hangings around her bed shut and sank back onto the mattress, covering her face with a groan.

Half an hour later, when Emmeline returned from dinner, she was still in the same place, and, when coaxed, Lily was only able to keep repeating the same words over and over. "I kissed him Em. Shit, I _kissed_ him and then I ran off and it's awful… I _kissed_ him…"

Emmeline simply grimaced as she perched on the bed to pat her friend's shoulder. "You know, I might have been wrong. Maybe you do get it after all."

* * *

"Prongs, come on. It's five to six now, you're going to miss training."

Sirius Black sighed heavily and folded his arms. "Jaaames." Still receiving no answer, he scrunched up a ball of parchment and flung it at his friend's head. "Oi, Potter!"

This finally seemed to do the trick (luckily too, because Madam Pince had been hovering in an extremely forbidding manner) and James jerked out of his thoughts and turned to face his friend. "Er yeah, it's a really simple wand movement. Stabbing."

"Thanks mate, but you can keep your sex life to yourself," Sirius smirked. "I was saying you'll miss Quidditch."

James waved his hand in a distracted manner. "Nah, I cancelled it."

"You-" Sirius' eyes nearly popped out of his head. James Potter had never once cancelled a team training session- bad weather, tests, or otherwise. It was one of his worst faults. "Are you alright?"

"Yeah I just- I need to be here, you know?"

Sirius blinked. As far as he had been aware, they were in this godforsaken place to work on human transfiguration- not that they really needed to, and that had been suspicious enough in itself.

"No," He began slowly. "I don't know. So is this the plan? We're staying here until- until when exactly?" Once again, James ignored him and he swung his legs off the library desk, leaning forward to peer after his friend. His shoulders sank at the sight which greeted him and he let out a groan. "Oh bloody hell, I thought we were past this stage? _Prongs_."

"Huh? Oh er, no it's not like that Padfoot. I just- it's hard to explain."

Sirius frowned seriously at him. "Look mate, it was funny two years ago, but now it's just sad. Besides, apparently I owe Evans one, so I'm not going to back you up if you start stalking her."

Over the summer, the news of Regulus Black's induction into the world of muggle-slaughtering had prompted quite the reaction in his older brother. Eventually, James had had to take him aside and go over the circumstances of a particular incident in their fifth year involving a werewolf and a nosy Severus Snape, and it had only been then that Sirius had found out of Lily Evans' role in the affair. Now that he knew, he often wondered how he could have believed for so long that James- who had all the observational skills of Professor Binns on a rant- had been capable of working out, from an article in the Daily Prophet, the reasons behind Sirius' temporary loss of control that night. And, while he was reluctant to show it, he couldn't help but feel somewhat grateful towards the Head Girl for effecting the reconciliation with his friends. If James was about to ruin all his good behaviour by sliding back into his old methods of trying to win her over… well Sirius would have to put his foot down.

But, thankfully, his words seemed to shake James out of his trance, looking horrified. "You don't think- that's not what this is about. Well it is, but not like that. It's- look, just give me a break ok? I need to think."

"Well, cheers. Don't get your knickers in a twist, I was only saying." But it would take a lot more than that to shut Sirius Black up permanently, and after a moment of swinging on his chair thoughtfully, he began again. "So come on then, what's the plan? Vance and MacDonald left ages ago, she's all alone if you want a chat."

"I don't want to- I mean I do but I don't-"

"Bleeding hell James, just tell me what's going on!"

"She kissed me, alright? Happy?"

Sirius let out a bark of laughter. "Yeah, right." But, as James continued to stare at him blankly, he dropped back onto all four legs of the chair and leaned in, grinning widely. "Get away, really? Nah she didn't. Rubbish, I don't believe you. Fuck _off_."

Eventually though, James' earnest expression convinced him and he recovered himself enough to choke out. "When was this?"

"Last night. Then you stuck your nose in and we never finished it."

Sirius shook his head in awe. "You jammy bastard, how d'you swing that?"

"Dunno, we were talking and then she- well she just went for it." James gave a slightly dazed laugh as if thinking back. "I- I mean it was good but then she just- left."

"You never said!"

"Well I tried to say something to her but- bloody hell, it's all my fault, I should have said something. I just didn't know…it was such a shock, you know?"

"Yeah I get it, I saw your face," Sirius was almost as happy about the whole thing as James and couldn't stop grinning. "I'm telling you though, this is wicked. Your Dad owes me ten galleons."

"You bet on me?"

"Only on the chances of you getting your kiss at least once, you know, a peck under the mistletoe or something. But she actually full on snogged you?"

James nodded and Sirius howled with laughter, much to the displeasure of Madam Pince, who shushed him angrily from the other end of the room. After making a rude two-fingered gesture behind her back, Sirius leant in again. "So then, you here to ask her out?"

"No I-" James floundered. "I, er, I don't think that's such a great idea, actually. Maybe we should just go-"

"What?! You dragged me all the way down here to stare at Evans for an hour and now you're not even going to ask her out?"

"Look Padfoot, I've wanted to kiss her for three years, and then she did it first. Maybe if I just wait-"

"I thought you were just going on about how you should have said something. Don't you think she'd like you to ask her out, you plonker?"

"What if she didn't like it though- the kiss I mean? I bet that's why she left, I didn't live up to the expectation or something…"

"She went out with Ed MacMillan once, you can't have been worse than that mug," Sirius rolled his eyes. "Just get it over with, or I'll do it for you."

James hesitated for a second and then stood up, taking a deep breath. "Right. Right, this is it. I'm going to do it. I'm going to- shit, she's coming this way. Shit, shit, shit, move Padfoot."

"James-" Sirius threw his hands up in the air as his friend pushed past him to dive under the table. Lily Evans was indeed heading in their general direction, having gathered up her homework and on her way to the exit. Sirius was fairly convinced that she had spotted them out of the corner of her eye, because her pace seemed to quicken and she ducked her head to hide behind a curtain of red hair as she escaped. Glancing back at his cowering friend, Sirius swore and then hurried after Lily, but upon reaching the door, found that she had disappeared from sight. Wandering back to the table, he placed his hands on his hips and shook his head at James. "You bloody pansy. What the hell's wrong with you two?"

"I told you, she hates me!"

"Look Prongs, pull yourself together. I reckon Evans is feeling exactly the same way you are, so if you both stop mucking around, we might actually get somewhere."

"Really?" Sirius swallowed his laughter at the pathetic look on his friend's face and nodded. "Yes, really. Tell you what, I'll ask Moony what he thinks you should do. Or maybe MacDonald could put in a good word for you-"

"No," James shook his head adamantly as he climbed back onto his chair. "No, don't tell anyone, because then if it goes wrong... This is it, Padfoot, the final push. I'm going to do it myself. I just- I just need to work out _how_…"

"You need to grow a pair of balls, mate," Sirius observed with a snort. "But fine, we'll get this sussed out ourselves. Endgame, right?"

"Yeah, endgame. Tell anyone and you're dead."

But even as the words were spoken, neither was aware of the fact that, four floors above, a small group of students sat contemplating exactly the same conundrum, and were already hard at work trying to solve it…

* * *

_**Ok, well first of all thank you to SkylarkAincrad for reviewing- I'm glad you enjoyed it and hope I haven't outstayed my welcome by adding another chapter (it had been planned all along that there would only be seven but I couldn't fit everything in and so we have eight). Hopefully this doesn't seem like too much of a wasted chapter- it's all build-up and hopefully it will all fit together neatly eventually.**_

_**Also, first kiss here, so I hope I didn't ruin that bit and it came across as reasonably realistic.**_

_**Lastly, as ever, I like to hear people's views, so please tell me what to improve :)**_

_**Chapter title from David Bowie's 1971 song of the same name.**_


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